Funny statuses and aphorisms about women's age

Who's old? I'm not old!

It’s easy to laugh when old age is far away and is not about you at all, but what to do when you yourself begin to grow old? Of course, keep smiling - cool statuses about your old age!

Of course, I’m not hinting that I’ve aged... But now I make the sounds that I made in bed with men when I get out of bed.
Old age came to me here. She was knocking at my house. Quiet! I won’t give in to her, I don’t give a damn, I’ll be young again!
I went outside today and got bored. I thought I might go hang out with the guys. Well, there, as usual - tea, coffee, everything... and then I remembered that I came out for my pension!
Old age may not be a joy. But somehow my youth didn’t work out either...
Some unknown law of meanness - the older I am, the younger I feel... I won’t turn out to be a decent granny.
When I get old, I will have the same girlfriend, whom I will call and cry in such an old voice: “Well, old bitch, when are we going to spend our pension?”
Now, when I see a beautiful girl in a miniskirt, my blood sugar just rises...
I am the kind of person who will never in my life come to terms with the fact that my youth is over!
Getting old is when you feel something hard in your mouth while eating, and your first thought is: “If only it’s not a tooth!”
When you start spending more money on doctors than on alcohol, then you can safely start to consider yourself old.
When you are young, you ask the question: “Well, when will this happen?!” And as you get older, you ask more and more often: “What year did you say it was?”
Getting old is when you have to take glasses with you... to read the ingredients on labels while you're sitting on the toilet.
It seems that progress does not stand still, toothpastes are getting better, but every year there are fewer and fewer teeth...
Remember: in your youth you need to make mistakes, as an adult you need to learn to correct them, but in old age you will regret them!

Old age is not joy

Don't want to grow old? Smile more often! Funny statuses about old age, which, although inevitable, still won’t happen without a fight!

When gray hair starts to show up in your beard, you usually have to put your jaw in a glass!
Old age is when you stop worrying about your appearance, but start worrying about your insides!
Old age is when the word “bouquet” is more often pronounced in the context of illnesses than flowers.
Oh, do you think they learn from mistakes? If the old people could, they would happily repeat all the mistakes of their youth.
Yesterday a lady on the subway gave up her seat for me... old age turned out to be sudden!
I don’t understand people who worry about turning so many years old! Don't worry - each number only happens once!
Old age is a gainful thing.
The dignity of men in old age turns into a disadvantage. If you know what I mean…
Girls want to look like women, women want to look like girls. And only grandmothers don’t care about these age prejudices!
When we get old, we'll get together in a group of bitchy grannies and call each other "old bitches"!
I wonder, when we get old, will we go on the Internet and write grumblingly everywhere about how all the comments were crap by youngsters?
Old age is when you have to grind your teeth, not your bed.
Old age is when you start buying bags of popcorn for the fiber, and not because there's a surprise at the bottom...
Old age is when call girls are brought on call at 03!
You shouldn’t think that people become smarter in old age... in 30% of cases it’s quite the opposite!
An idiot, when he grows old, will not become wise - he will become an old idiot!
The uncontrollability of time is especially clearly felt when you have to scroll through the drop-down list on websites longer and longer to enter your date of birth...
It’s not difficult to get used to age... but, damn it, it’s constantly changing...

Adult thoughts

Whatever people who still can’t get rid of rose-colored glasses think, life is a complex and unpredictable thing. And only those who have seen shit in their lifetime understand it. Adult statuses with meaning - share your worldly wisdom.

At some point you outgrow your adulthood and become a child in the body of an old man...
I have one big problem: childhood is still playing at the fifth point, but I already have to live like an adult...
When I was little, I thought that adults were not afraid of anything... now I have grown up and understand how wrong I was!
Adults love toys too... just bigger and more expensive ones.
How wonderful it is that we are already adults and can do all sorts of adult things... reflection and soul-searching, for example.
The only thing that distinguishes a child from an adult is the dream of growing up.
One of the hardest things in life is watching someone you love love someone else...
I hate that state when it seems like I don’t care, but at the same time it hurts terribly.
For every second spent with you - thank you.
It's time to add a "return sent message" feature to phones.
All my life I've been scared as hell of losing the people I love... I wonder if any of them were afraid of losing me?
When people don’t love you, you can’t force them to love you. When they don’t believe, there is no point in making excuses. When you are not appreciated, there is no need to humiliate yourself.
You are not afraid to try again - you are just afraid that you will be hurt again for the same reason.
Don’t hold anyone back: those who love will remain so, and those who don’t will still leave...
I'm losing everyone I'm attached to. Every time I open up to a person, they leave my life.
There are few people left who will understand and support you without judging you behind your back.
Dogs definitely have what we call a soul. Unlike some people...
Some people just pretend to want to help.
Happy is only the one who knows how to appreciate what already is, and not what will be...
Love is when at some point you realize that others are no longer interesting.

Quotes about age - funny jokes and aphorisms about age

I'm not at that age when stupid things are done unconsciously. I am at the age when they are done consciously and with pleasure.

A real woman is like a violin - age only increases its value and improves its sound.

Each of us atones for the guilt of our youth.

At my age, behaving decently is no longer decent.

Now I know exactly what adolescence is. Transitional age is when wrinkles have already appeared, but acne has not yet gone away.

Seventeen-year-olds are too young to be allowed to drink, watch porn, or enter into contracts, but mature enough to choose a profession for the rest of their lives.

I don’t attract anyone, I’m not looking for anyone Photo I don’t decorate, I don’t want to photoshop! I don’t reduce my age, I don’t shout about it - I’m silent, I’m like that - growing. I want to be real!

Old age is no worse than youth: every age has its own discoveries.

The transitional age is when there is a holiday, the family is at the table, and you sit sad and begin to understand that you no longer want Coca-Cola, but they haven’t poured vodka yet.

Youth dreams of what will never come true, old age remembers what never came true.

Every age has its own charms, but in youth there are also strangers.

Youth, a rising wave. Behind the wind, ahead of the rocks.

How small is the gap between the time when a person is still too young and when he is already too old.

There is no point in hiding how old you are; there is a risk that they will give you more.

First we believe the cuckoo, and then we hope that it is wrong

The sad thing is not that old age is approaching, but that youth is leaving.

Do not judge age by years - lest you be judged.

Youth is a gift of nature, and maturity is a work of art.

Old age is not such a great misfortune if we consider another possibility.

I'm not afraid. When you live for so long, you lose a lot, including the feeling of fear.

Age looked mockingly from the mirror.

Sayings about age and old age - age status

Wisdom, oddly enough, comes to us with two “Gs”: genes and years

And before I was fifty, I thought that I would forever be eighteen.

Only those who have achieved nothing, having lived to be forty or fifty years old, do not deserve respect.

Life is divided into three parts: when you believe in Santa Claus, when you don’t believe in Santa Claus, and when you are already Santa Claus yourself.

And before I was fifty, I thought that I would forever be eighteen.

An adult is one who has stopped growing vertically, but not horizontally.

The older you get, the dumber the world around you becomes, and the more beautiful the girls become.

The age of a woman who criticizes everyone is called critical age.

If a woman treats age with humor, it means that he really is not funny.

The most beautiful age of a woman is the age of love.

Einstein was right: with age, a person's energy turns into mass.

Old age is a parody of life.

The secret to eternal youth is to live virtuously, eat slowly, and lie about your age.

Growing up is...

When does a person become an adult? Probably everyone will have their own answer. Because everyone grows up in their own way. Statuses for adults who know what they are worth.

This status is not free, reading it is worth one happy smile! I ask you to pay, and not read in debt!
Don't regret past mistakes. If you had not done them, you would never have known what was right...
It seems to me that I am growing up... more and more people who were friends are becoming just acquaintances.
Oh, believe me, everyone had such a moment in life when it seemed to him that he was alone in the whole world. This will pass.
I have no concept of “dating.” I have a concept of “being together.”
Remember, this world is not perfect, just like you.
There are many beautiful ones - there should be only one dear one.
All adults were once small and stupid, but for some reason most of them prefer not to remember this when they judge the younger generation...
People become adults not when they stop listening to what their mother teaches them... but when they realize why their mother was right!
Do you remember how we were little and absolutely seriously could not understand why adults love alcohol so much?
Growing up is when, instead of a couple of bottles of beer, you buy a couple of packs of juice, because it really tastes better...
Children are the biggest mystery for adults!
Growing up is when, instead of asking questions about where something comes from, you ask the question about where something goes!
Every adult sometimes wakes up a child who wants to go crazy and whine!
Do you know when you stop being happy? When you grow up... you no longer believe in miracles.
Children's imagination is so boundless because it is not yet constrained by the boundaries of gray reality...
Adults who do not know how to love are made from children who were not loved...

Man's age: statuses

There is an opinion that men are less sentimental in matters related to age. Is it so? They will try to answer the question about age statuses for men.

“The more a man matures, the more women he finds attractive.”
“There is a period when a man realizes that it’s time for him to get married. At the same moment, a woman understands that being alone is a privilege.”
“At 40, a man feels younger than ever.”
“The growing up of a man is indifference to where his wife went. If only she didn’t drag it with her.”
“Twenty-year-old men add to their age when meeting a girl. The same can’t be said about thirty-year-olds.”
“A man’s sense of his youth depends on whether he has lived all this time with one woman or several.”

Statuses with meaning about age

“Remember, no matter how old you are, you are always younger than you will ever be.”
“You begin to see your own years in your peers who are growing up.”
“In middle age you understand more about the elderly and less about the young.”
“A man’s age is how he feels. A woman’s age is the assessment of others.”
“The same actions at different ages are perceived differently. At 16 it might be a mistake, but at 30 it’s a conscious decision.”
“What difference does it make how old you are? If you still want to love, have fun and find new things in life -
“We always remain children at heart. Only over the years do we become covered with a layer of rules of behavior and principles.”

about age

Statuses about age are usually chosen by those who are familiar with worries about fading youth, who would give a lot for the opportunity to stop time and enjoy the current minute. That is why such statements are often full of nostalgia and sadness.

“The ability to wait for a miracle fades over the years.”
“The meaning of childhood cartoons sometimes only comes to light in adulthood.”
“The beginning of aging is when many things become indifferent.”
“It’s sad to see how young people have stopped enjoying life. It’s like they’re over 70.”
“The number in the passport that separates us from today is not an indicator of maturity. Intelligence does not come with age, but with the number of tragedies experienced.”
“Wrinkles are the most accurate indicator of the quality of life lived. Some people have a smile on their face, others have fatigue and pain.”
“To start changing something in life, you should think: would you like to return to this day in old age or not?”
“With age, the body becomes for the still living soul.”