Where I am? Who am I?
But interesting things can happen in the morning. Especially when in the evening you no longer remember yourself, then funny statuses about the morning have an alarming overtone:
- The worst thing is to open your eyes in the morning after a party - after all, surprise after surprise awaits you, okay, if the surprise nearby is not terrible.
- In the morning I woke up unknown where and with whom, but I was worried about something else - was there mineral water?
- I dreamed of starting the morning with a run - I finally succeeded - I opened my eyes, and there was some kind of crocodile nearby, so I ran.
- Do you want to run in the morning and not make excuses? Spend the night in other people's beds - in the morning one way or another you will have to do your feet.
- My mother told me not to get so drunk, I didn’t listen, and now I don’t even understand what city I’m in.
- I remember a fun evening, whiskey and cola - and that’s it - I woke up - there was a man next to me - how did you get to me? Yes, it was you who somehow got to me. He also couldn’t remember anything.
- To prevent the morning from being gloomy, do not make the evening too bright.
- If you wake up in someone else's unfamiliar bed, don't panic, drink some water with dignity and run from there.
- Before you open your eyes the morning after a stormy party, feel everything that surrounds you - maybe you are afraid in vain, and you are home.
Funny good morning wishes, short poems with humor
Texts of cool and very funny and short good morning wishes in verse. Send your friends and loved ones a voice SMS to their phone wishing them a good day and a good mood.
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Hello , and happy new morning to you! Hello, I am writing to you, lovingly. Hello, and it's going to be a great day! Today I will meet you.
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Drops of dew fill the dawn, Sunlight presents a portrait of New ideas and any beginnings. May your morning be joyful.
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The night has passed, it’s time to get up, greet good morning. Wake up, my dear. Good morning dear!
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“ You are good,” I whisper, And I want to hug you. Life episodes again They offer you roles. So, quickly get up and get involved in the new plot...
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Heaven will send rays and the alarm clock will sing, Don’t hit it in the morning! Good morning! Of good!
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What a morning! What a miracle! Wake up urgently people! Beauty all around, lovely! Let's have an interesting day!
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Good morning, beloved cat, May your day be unique. I hug you mentally, tenderly, I dream about the evening, languidly with hope.
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A very good morning! I want to scream. I wish you happiness, love and success before everyone else!
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morning , glorious morning! And have a great day everyone! And let us have enough of the cheerful fire from the sun.
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so beautiful, As if dressed in a warm shawl, May it give you strength to live easily and beautifully!
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A new day is knocking at the window, Good morning, happy new day. May the sun warm you and love in your heart.
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good morning. Let this day open the door to new desires, Because I always believe in you.
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You can be kind, If we live happily, We wake up in the mood, We will try our best!
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In a glass drop of dew, a ray of sun sparkles happily. Be just as happy in the morning! A wonderful day awaits you!
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The dawn has risen in the east, A new day begins to count down, As soon as you open your eyes, love will overwhelm you!
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Well , the baby finally woke up, open your eyes quickly. Please don’t gasp, groan, “put on” a smile, everyone get up.
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Good morning, get up quickly, Let all your problems run away in an instant, Smile at a wonderful life all day, Bright joys await you here.
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all the best, Wake up, stretch. I hug you tenderly, read and smile!
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Good morning to you, And let nothing overshadow the day that you have to live, And let it inspire you to heroic deeds!
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Good morning to good people! Today you can conquer the world. Luck accompanies now. The fairy tale is real, just believe it.
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Greetings from the Strength and happiness for many years to come, Joy and achievements, Love of sweet moments!
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Good morning, dear friend! The sun has risen, rise up too, so that you can live a wonderful day, adding beauty to the world.
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What a beautiful morning it was! How the birds sang by the window! With them I send you a Cocktail of smiles and kindness.
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sweetly , gently rubs his eyes... After all, morning has come into its own, - It’s very difficult to argue with him! "Good morning! Climb! Stop sleeping! Get up and run!”
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How I want to be near you now, To wish you a good morning, To touch you with a tender gaze And timidly kiss you on the cheek.
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Good morning, let the sun warm, let luck be invigorated, never sleep, in every moment of inspiration, love, aspiration and pleasure!
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The world is crumbling for happiness. The sun gives us rainbow light. This light is like a native smile. Smile back too!
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with Happiness, light, kindness! May it be just as cool for you and me all day!
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Good morning! Let the sun wake up and smile at you through your eyelashes!
Good morning! Have a nice day! Thank you for having me!
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Let that dawn give you warmth, Happiness, hope and magic, Let your cherished plans come true, Let your plans always work out!
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Oh open your eyes, you will see the light! There is no more pleasant morning in life, It is full of joy and beauty, It gives strength, hopes, dreams!
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May this morning be the kindest! May this day bring only joy! Work without knowing fatigue. People like you are always lucky.
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Walk this morning with love and kindness, May your home be filled, May everything work out without fail, May life be joyful and extraordinary!
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The sun woke up, The morning smiled kindly. The blanket was pulled, the arms and legs were pulled. Good morning, don’t yawn, my sunshine, get up!
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Have an amazing morning, amazing sunrise! It’s just a pity you’re not with me this morning. But I hasten to wish you a good day. And from a loving heart I write these lines.
Who said good morning?
Statuses about good morning can be meaningfully created by those who faced various unforeseen situations in the morning hours and came out of any life impasse with honor:
- Good morning, country, I’m not the only one - everyone is rushing to work at breakneck speed.
- Good morning happens only 2 times a week - on Saturday and Sunday, all other morning hours are a horror movie.
- He jumped out of bed and ran out into the street. I ran to the bus stop and thought - why are there no people at the bus stop? Damn, today is Saturday...
- I become a biorobot - especially in the morning - everything is adjusted to the smallest detail - every movement is under control, nothing superfluous, no emotions.
- Psychologists say that in the morning you need to stand in front of the mirror and say to yourself 10 times with a smile on your face: “I am happy, joyful and absolutely healthy.” I don’t have time to do this at all, and when I do, you should have seen my smile, my face distorted with hatred.
- I stood up and reached for the nightstand - and the nightstand wasn’t mine - where did they put my furniture? It turned out that this is not my apartment either.
- After the party, I was afraid to open my eyes for half an hour - I thought that I was lying in bed with an unfamiliar macho man, and even at his home. Half an hour later I made up my mind - I opened my eyes - there was no happier person than me - I was at home and alone.
- I only like mornings when I'm on vacation and away from work.
- I'll tell you more - the morning is not only not good, it is evil, disgusting, mocking. It's just making fun of me.
- Have you ever watched the sunrise with a stranger in his bed and his wife walks in? No - and well done, God forbid.
Let me tell you briefly
Funny short statuses about the morning are posted by those who have no time to rant, but just want to cheer up in the morning:
- I like to have fun, especially sleep.
- Don't wake me up, don't wake me up, I don't want to go to work.
- The morning of an alcoholic begins at 5 am, because sleep is short and restless.
- Fun fun, hard to get up in the morning.
- There is never a good morning.
- Good morning is a mockery of those who got up at 6 am.
- Who gets up early, God gives him, but life gives him.
- I got up early and didn’t get the star.
- Getting up early in the morning ruins the whole day with a constant desire to sleep.
- No, I'm not a morning person, I'm different.
- I have healthy sleep - I can fall asleep even in the middle of a meeting.
- No work should interfere with healthy sleep.
- Groundhog morning, April Fool's day.
- Morning, afternoon, evening - there’s nothing to remember at all.
- The morning begins with a smile, above yourself...
Jokes and anecdotes about good morning
- Good morning! What track do you wake up to? - Under the puncher!
- Good morning, keyboard! Would you like some coffee? - Honey, good morning, how did you sleep? “It’s not good at all, the mosquitoes ate it all night!” - Wow, I haven’t been bitten once during the night! - Who needs you if such a candy lies nearby! - Good morning, bunny! - Good morning, little fish! - Shall I make you some coffee, little sparrow? - Yes, thank you, kitty! - Have you forgotten my name too? A truly good morning begins only with lunch...
- Good morning, my love... How did you sleep? What did you dream of? - Why have you suddenly become so caring? He cheated on me?! - Oh, go to hell! - That's better…
- Morning, metro. The majority have headphones in their ears, the minority is still dozing, in general, there is no reaction to others, no interest in life. And then suddenly everyone perked up, began looking at each other, moving around the salon. I just farted quietly.
Check it out: Jokes about lawyers
In the morning in the mirror: “Well, beauty, we’ll save the world or scare passers-by.” - Good morning, darling! - Good morning, my little birch! - How affectionate you are! and why “birch tree”? - Because in bed it’s like a log! In the morning I do exercises: I bend over and try to touch the floor with my palms. The husband comes out of the bathroom and says: “Well, no need to bow... just say: Good Morning, Tsar!” The husband comes home in the morning, opens the door and gets hit between the eyes with a rolling pin. When he came to his senses, the crying wife said: “Vasya, I’m sorry!” I completely forgot that you were on the night shift.
The work, although not a wolf, is still
Morning stress is often associated with work - you need to get up on time so as not to be late for work. Then the status about morning and work may have a sad connotation:
- I promised myself not to oversleep, and I didn’t oversleep, but was late for work.
- Excuses about traffic jams no longer work at work, I’ll come up with the most implausible thing - a fire.
- When doctors say that you shouldn’t be stressed and upset, it’s better to make a proposal to make the working day from 12 noon, then there will be no stress.
- If work interferes with sleep, you don't need that kind of work.
- Not only does work destroy my psyche in the morning, it also allows life to pass me by.
- As a child, I so dreamed of going to work and being a great specialist - it came true. But why didn’t I dream of getting paid for it and working remotely?
- Only on the subway you see how all the people are happily rushing to work - everyone has such faces as if they had just buried someone.
- The law of meanness is to wake up the entire work week and jump up on time on the day off.
- Work is happiness, especially when it is within walking distance from your place of residence. All other work is torture and daily survival tests.
- We are like wounded up puppets rushing about at work - from morning until dark, and the boss is again in the Maldives.
- I dream of becoming unemployed, but my conscience and subsistence basket prohibit it.
- If they paid for my work, I would get up without moaning and screaming, and since they throw bones to mad dogs, I howl every morning.
- When the morning is sunny, you really want to relax and not work, and in cloudy weather you don’t want to wake up at all.
The funniest morning jokes
— They say that walking barefoot is good for your health. - Yes indeed. “When I wake up in the morning with my boots on, I have a terrible headache.”
The Germans came to visit. I tell them: if you want to go to the toilet, your felt boots are in the corner. In the morning the felt boots were full. - Why the hell did you come drunk again at 7 in the morning? - Don’t I have the right to have breakfast with my family? Morning of the newlyweds - Dear, get up, I cooked porridge for you. - Of what? - From dumplings... - You insulted me! I challenge you to a duel! Tomorrow morning, at 4 o'clock, outside the outskirts. The choice of weapon is yours... - No, no weapons! I kneel down and humbly ask for your forgiveness... - Okay, so be it, I forgive you, you despicable coward! “It’s better to be a contemptible coward than to get up so early!” – Have you seen “Planet of the Apes”? - Yes, every morning on the subway. – What is your cat’s name? – During the day or at 5 am?
Our cat comes to our bed every morning, lies down on the pillow with its muzzle to my wife’s ear and purrs. This makes my wife very happy. My wife somehow doesn’t think about the fact that the cat is on the opposite side to my face.
Early in the morning a bell rang in my apartment. The young man standing on the threshold said: “Good morning!” I am Jehovah's Witnesses and would like to talk to you. - Okay, go into the apartment. He passed, but looked somewhat confused. I asked him: “So, what did you want to talk to me about?” “I don’t even know, I’ve never gone this far before.” - Wake up, the alarm clock is ringing! - I’m sleeping... I’ll call him back later... I’m going to work one morning, I walk calmly, I’m not late. And then I realize that there is a blanket and a pillow around me, I’m in bed and I’m screwed! — You look bad this morning. Did you drink yesterday? - Well, if I had known in advance that I would feel this way, of course I would have drunk it! Plans for the morning: 1) Oversleep. 2) Be late. 3) Fuck it.
4 410
Groundhog morning
When you are tired of the monotony of life and the repetitiveness of a typical morning, you can add variety and humor to this running in circles by setting funny good morning statuses:
- Every morning it’s the same thing: the alarm clock rings, I lie down for another 5 minutes, it turns out to be half an hour. I jumped up, splashed water on myself, took a sip of water in the kitchen, kicked the cat, ran out into the street, I hate everyone. The bus is crowded, everyone is pushing, I’m quietly hitting my neighbors on the bus with my elbows. I run from the bus stop to work. I’m exactly 3 minutes late, I see a sarcastic boss. I bow to him, he asks me to write an explanatory note - why I was late again, I come up with a new topic. I work for 8 hours and trudge home. How long can you live like this, guys? Don't want!
- I'm so tired of the monotony of getting ready for work in the morning - at least the cat pissed in my shoes... just for a change.
- Rejoice every morning, although you roughly know that there is nothing special to rejoice at.
- You can be able to see the beauty in the ordinary even in the morning, when absolutely everything infuriates you.
- As my grandmother used to say, the sun shining in the morning is already a joy. For some reason, for me this is a reason to be upset once again - such sunny, beautiful weather, and again I’m going to a stuffy office.
- This is a song about me: “If you, frowning, leave the house...” How could it be different? I know that a cunning boss and evil colleagues are waiting for me.