Do not promise if you are not sure that you will fulfill your promise, because the pain that you cause to another will sooner or later return to you.
***
If the creators of my life had a certain sense of humor, then the creators of love clearly have suicidal tendencies!
***
Don't come so close to me! Passions and sparks will instantly flare up. For me, the fire for you does not go out with time, unfortunately. Or maybe it’s fortunate when there are such passions?!
***
Never judge others who know that maybe in the same situation you would have done much worse
***
Live now, not once! There is only one life, and it is not given twice!!! Let's go in and look at the history of statuses, everything has meaning, and we mark the ones we like!
***
A serious relationship is when a guy sees a pretty and stylish girl in a store or on the street, looks at her, looks and thinks: “I need to buy my girl the same hat.”
***
If you don’t build your life yourself, then someone will definitely build it for you.
I walk with my eyes closed and a smile from ear to ear, towards my future happiness, through a field of rakes. 33
***
From the statement: “Like me everything” Crossed out. “Like I did you all” Crossed out. “You all should go to” Crossed out. “Please grant me another vacation.” 20
***
I want chronic health, progressive happiness, recurring success, hypertensive salary, and an eternally pregnant wallet without the threat of miscarriage!))) 30
***
The best way to test a guy’s loyalty is to ask the sleeping person in the morning the question: “Will you go to yours or will you stay with me?” 28
***
- You can't look in the mirror when you're eating away your happiness. And when you drink, you drink. It’s better not to hang a mirror in the toilet at all 24
***
No money to change your wardrobe, change your job! For the new team, all your old clothes are new. 37
***
Flowers should be for no reason. Happiness should be unique. The house is warm. Weather, it doesn’t matter what the weather is! But love should be mutual. 16
***
All people bring happiness, some by their presence, others by their absence) 26
***
- If men knew what women were thinking, they would court twenty times more boldly. 22
***
- Dad! When they come to ask for my hand, do not fall on your knees, do not say, “You are our Savior. ", just quietly nod your head)))
***
At the station: - Hey, slut! - I'm not a slut, I'm a porter! “Then rape these two suitcases until the ninth carriage!”
***
Here is the alphabet, you can make up whatever you want by letter - ʁ o є q ıq qmm q x f ʎ ʟ ɔ d o n wv ʞ and є z ǝ 6 L ʚ g ɐ
Funny statuses with meaning
Get up in the morning more energetic, maybe this day will make you believe in miracles again!
***
You like even the shortcomings in a loved one, and even the advantages in an unloved person irritate you.
***
- I don't want to marry a cheapskate like you! Here, take your ring! Where's the box?
***
I know that you are far from indifferent to me. You know that I have feelings for you. We pretend not to notice. We are waiting for each other's actions
***
Just because I pretended I didn’t notice doesn’t mean you can get away with anything.
***
Will you go alone? It's already so dark outside. It's okay, I'll try not to scare anyone.
Original phrases
Funny statuses with meaning will definitely please both the person himself and the people around him, they will help you tune in to the positive and ensure a great holiday:
- Let them talk badly about me, I will always find something to add to it.
- No one can limit your actions like the phrase: “Do whatever you want!”
- Guys are jealous of girls only when they love them, girls are jealous even if they don’t love them.
- If you are unable to find an approach to me, then it is easier to bypass me.
- Nothing can make you trust a person like full prepayment.
- If you know perfectly well who is to blame, you should under no circumstances give yourself away.
- You should always walk with your eyes closed and smile to your own happiness, the main thing is to overcome the field with a rake.
- If a girl wants to test a young man’s fidelity, she needs him in the morning, when he is still sleeping: “Will you go home or stay with me today?”
- Usually the phrase: “How huge he is!” the spider hears - verified.
- You can't look in the mirror while eating, you can eat your own happiness. And when you drink, you can drink it away. And it is generally not recommended to hang it in the toilet.
- If you don’t have the money to change your wardrobe, you need to change your job. For the new team, all old clothes will be completely new.
- Flowers should be given for no reason, happiness should be unique, the house should always be cozy, and depending on the weather, the main thing is that there is mutual love.
- Each person is capable of bringing happiness, only one - by his presence, and the other - by his absence.
- If you think about what I can give to a person who has everything, then the answer suggests itself - in the jaw.
- If men certainly knew the thoughts of women, they would court them boldly and persistently, and not hesitate on the sidelines, as they usually do.
- Only nesting dolls can live in perfect harmony.
- The most important thing in every person’s life is that they really wait for him at home, and not wait for him.
- The Lord protects everyone, only he himself sets the period of preservation.
- Every day I am convinced that life without brains really exists.
- No one can die virgins, because life was given in order to have everyone.
Cool statuses with meaning
What is good? What is evil? Really? What's a lie? We have long come up with names for everything, We see light and darkness, we feel love, And we assign punishments to ourselves for our sins.
***
- And we do not live the way we were taught to live, After all, those who taught us lived differently, And then we did not teach their words, But only the contradictions of these words.
***
We see light in the world and think about happiness, And if we see evil, then we think about darkness. But why do we need pain, problems and bad weather, When you so want to love and trust your dream.
***
All our lives we sit in a cage of beliefs, We are prisoners of our invisible shackles: Memories, fears and doubts, We want to defeat invented enemies.
***
Or maybe it’s worth looking at the world differently, Seeing joy, light and beauty in life, Believing that problems, troubles and good fortune Lead us together to light and goodness.
***
And maybe it’s worth losing the war? Accept and love yourself as we are now, and stop fighting, and don’t try to become different anymore!
***
- Look at the world and see the light again, Forgive yourself all fears and grievances, And believe that the answer will always be found, Let your soul and mind remain open.
Funny notes
Funny statuses about life with meaning, new ones will bring a lot of positivity and make you start life in a new way:
- Intelligence will never help against a fool.
- The strong may fall, but whoever gets up is always much stronger.
- If a person is loved, then even his shortcomings will still be liked, but if he is unloved, then even his merits will cause irritation.
- Life cracked again, it didn’t work out, all that was left were bags under the eyes.
- Each person can feel himself only with someone whom he completely trusts and does not doubt his honesty.
- You cannot lower your own bar for those who are unable to reach it.
- We truly love each other, he himself and I myself.
- Just because I pretend I don't notice doesn't mean you can get away with it.
- Wherever a person goes, he will always find only what he brought with him, nothing else shines for him.
Funny statuses will give you positive emotions and help you experience a few happy moments in life. You just need to have no doubt that in the future everything will really turn out well, and the white stripe will definitely replace the black one.
New funny funny cool statuses about life with meaning
And you, too, as a child, when you took a toy to sleep with you, thought that others would be offended and took everyone?
***
My wife asked for a mink for her birthday. I've been digging in the garden for two days now. Worried. Suddenly you don't like it.
***
If the streak of your life suddenly turns black, take a closer look, most likely it is white, and even covered in chocolate.
***
Paratroopers jumping unarmed in Africa are called humanitarian aid by local tribes.
***
- The longest and most exciting journey begins with the words: “I know a shortcut!”
***
There are statuses that you really like and accurately describe your condition, but you can’t repost because it’s too dirty.
***
It is difficult to find a good accountant, which is why Vera Pavlovna has been on the federal wanted list for twenty years.
***
It's stupid to expect someone to come and do it for you. Until you catch him and force him, no one will lift a finger.
***
My grandmother mistakenly went to the military registration and enlistment office for a medical examination instead of the hospital and came out absolutely healthy.
***
Those who say that you can’t eat at night, let them try to explain why the light in the refrigerator was invented.
***
Comrade residents! Why is there no toilet paper in elevators? What kind of disrespect for the guests of the entrance?!
***
Hugs without broken ribs or dislocated internal organs are considered insincere.
***
On his graduation ribbon, Andrei wrote his home address, his mother’s mobile number, and his blood type, and he was right.
***
Go to classes or sleep? Go to classes or sleep? Damn, I'll go to classes and sleep!
***
An experienced watermelon seller can tell with one click on the head whether his son is ready for the exam or not.
***
Sometimes guests come so suddenly that you don’t have time to hide the most delicious things from them.
***
Three important rules: don’t go to the store hungry, don’t go on a date horny, and don’t update your drunk status.
***
I wonder if a rickshaw driven by a stun gun can be considered an electric vehicle?
***
After all, the best thing about any vacation is not so much to relax yourself, but to watch others work.
***
A fifth-grader accidentally watched a tape with the caption “strawberry” and realized how hard it was for his grandmother to make this jam.
***
The right young lady stays for dinner not for the sake of dinner itself, but for the sake of a morning cup of coffee!
***
I belong to the generation that drew the margins in notebooks by hand! Who else?
***
Running into the minibus in the morning, you understand why the kindergarten had the game “Take a Chair.”
***
You begin to understand the theory of relativity when you stand for half an hour in front of a sign on a store: “Break 10 minutes.”
***
People, like pencils, each one draws life for himself. It’s just that someone breaks down, someone gets stuck, and someone sharpens and moves on with life.
***
I'm not a homebody, I'm a rationalist. Why walk down the street if you're going to come home anyway?
***
The physical education teacher wanted to dance at the disco, but no matter how hard he tried, he still ended up doing squats.
***
It's too early for me to have children. I'm not mentally ready to buy a kinder surprise and give it to someone.
***
Careers are more difficult for women because they do not have a wife to push them forward.
***
The neighbors downstairs thought that my personal life had improved, although in reality I just bought a jump rope.
***
Sometimes I can’t find a reasonable explanation for my actions, but then I remember that I’m a moron, and everything falls into place.
***
Imagine the situation: you are an employee of the credit department of a bank, and your neighbors come to you and want to buy karaoke.
***
If in the cinema the last row is for kissing, then what is the projectionist doing in his booth?
***
After the philosophy exam, Margarita had 20 favorite quotes on VKontakte.
***
I must have dreamed something very interesting last night if I took the pillowcase off the pillow in my dream.
***
In order to look good on the beach in the summer, Katya started fattening up her best friend in the spring.
***
Mosquitoes have become more cunning, they fly up, sit on the bed, and then walk on foot so that you can’t hear them.
***
The first stage of quitting smoking: you stop buying cigarettes and smoke only other people’s.
***
It looks like America will be the first country to ban sex because it infringes on the rights of impotent people.
***
The boy went to karate for three weeks, and then met with hooligans and did not go to karate for three weeks.
***
Only after taking out a mortgage did Vasily realize that congenital three kidneys were not a pathology, but a gift from God.
***
Many officials switch to domestic cars only when they are taken to a pre-trial detention center.
***
Only our minibus drivers accelerate and then slow down to close the door.
***
While I was standing in line at the psychiatrist for a certificate that I was not registered, I became so freaked out that they put me on the register.
***
The most terrible animal is the toad; it has strangled more than half of the world's population.
***
In the sense of comprehending meaninglessness, meaning also has a certain meaningfulness.
***
I wouldn’t like to pre-register for either hell or heaven: the fact is that I have friends both there and there.
***
Kolobok was always suspicious of friends’ offers to go bowling.
***
Eh, girls! We shouldn't have skipped physical education. There they taught how to jump over goats.
Short funny statuses
The only thing I ask is that you give me a chance to see that money cannot make me happy.
***
Before you say anything, make sure your tongue is connected to your brain.
***
No matter what house, no matter what floor you live on, a neighbor with a drill will find you and move in next to you.
***
If a woman has succeeded in life, looks stunning and confident in herself - she probably achieved all this to spite someone!
Interesting thoughts out loud
Funny statuses with meaning about life are designed to lift your spirits and give positive emotions:
- Why should I deny myself something today, and tomorrow too?
- A party at a dacha is usually fun and happy, if this dacha is not yours.
- When I said that I needed everything at once, I didn’t mean a problem at all.
- Sometimes life is literally in full swing, but sometimes it’s a wrench everywhere.
- Girls need to be promised everything in the world, and only buy ice cream.
- Women's hell presupposes the presence of all gay men; for men, by the way, this is also hell.
- You won’t be able to talk with a gag in your mouth, but thoughts creep into your head... darkness!
- I ask you very much, let me be convinced from my own experience that money is really not the main thing in life and will not bring me happiness.
- Before you say anything, you need to make sure that the tongue is actually connected to the brain.
- You can live in any house on any floor, but a neighbor with a drill will definitely find you and move in next to you.
- One day I come home and see there is dust everywhere, I sat down and thought, it wouldn’t hurt to lie around too...
- If you meet a successful and extraordinarily beautiful woman who is confident in her own abilities, it means that she probably achieved success in spite of some person.
- Things are going great, but where is not clear.
- The stronger sex is much weaker than the weaker, because it has a weakness for it.
- You can always surprise your friends by setting a regular ringtone on your phone instead of a popular song.
- It is impossible to convince a woman; she can only succumb to persuasion.
- It doesn’t matter what kind of education you have, the main thing is to have a higher education.
- There are always two roads in life - the easy one and mine, destined from above.
- Some people think too much about how to find the right person, but first of all you need to become that person yourself.
- If lovers do not trust each other, the only thing left to do is get married.
- My parents always wanted me to be good. And so it happened, only the sense disappeared somewhere, and what was left was something stupid.
- Childhood is always happy, because children experience delightful happiness when they run from the toilet at night and are sincerely glad that they were not eaten.
- Every morning you need to feel happy that you woke up, that you are lucky that you are alive and that you should not waste your life.