The series “Interns” is the legendary brainchild of the TNT channel and producer Vyacheslav Dusmukhametov. The first episode, released on screen in 2010, won the hearts of viewers from the very first minutes with its talented cast and extraordinary humor.
The action takes place in an ordinary Moscow hospital. Anastasia Konstantinovna Kisegach (chief physician) assigns four interns to Dr. Andrei Evgenievich Bykov (head of the therapeutic department). Varvara Chernous, Gleb Romanenko, Semyon Lobanov and Boris Levin are young and inexperienced specialists who have no idea what real medical practice is. Bykov did not like the innovation of the head physician, so from the first seconds he disliked the interns. However, his deep love for his work did not allow him to leave young specialists without the necessary knowledge and practice.
Bykov is a brilliant doctor, but at the same time a noble tyrant and tyrant, that’s why he didn’t babysit the interns. Thanks to Andrei Evgenievich’s love for sophistication and bullying, newcomers not only found themselves in ridiculous situations, but also received nicknames that the audience loved so much: “armless embryo”, “single-cell bacterium”, “slipper ciliate”, “feces bear”. The interns tried to fight the highly intellectual insults, but soon realized that Bykov did not know how to communicate differently.
The same fate befell Bykov’s best friend. Ivan Natanovich Kupitman is a venereologist from a neighboring department. The doctors had been working in the same hospital for several decades, so the communication between them was filled with a special amount of irony and caustic sarcasm.
Let's remember the main characters of the series and Bykov's funny statements regarding them.
Semyon Lobanov
Intern Lobanov is an experienced specialist. At the beginning of the series, he claimed that he worked in Ambulance for three years, so he has more experience than everyone else combined. Head department laughed at such a statement, calling Semyon “a dinosaur with a walnut instead of a brain.” Therefore, in Bykov’s conversation with Lobanov, there are phrases that clearly indicate a lack of intelligence:
Don't try to put words into sentences. This is not yours, Lobanov, not yours!
Yeah! You're kicking the air again! Squeezing the forest winds' tits!
Keep your thousand. Buy brains or a book on medicine with it. Better book! I'm afraid that the new brain will not take root in your body!
I don’t know what motivated you, Lobanov. I rule out logic right away.
Why are you so solemn? It's too early for the funeral. Your patient, no matter what, may still recover.
Well, Lobanov, have you already sharpened the ax of your stupidity?
The fact that Lobanov’s wife is a prostitute is acceptable. But the fact that a prostitute has a husband Lobanov is already nonsense!
- Lobanov, what are you doing here? - Like what?! I'm flying! - A! So, how was the flight?
Immerse yourself in your work. The head is a spherical thing that dangles on your shoulders!
Congratulations! You have a concussion. Well, in your case, it’s a vacuum shock.
Bykov's phrases
The article contains statements, quotes and phrases by Bykov, the main character from the TV series Interns:
I'll kill her. Will you help me hide the body? Well, in general, forget it.
Lobanov, why are you so solemn, it’s too early for the wake. Your patient, no matter what, may still recover.
You can't hit doctors! He is allowed (at this time he points to Levin), but doctors are not allowed!
Now I understand who the boss is here. department, and who - hey, you, white-haired woodpecker, got out of the way!
Funny quote by Bykov - We have a corpse running around our hospital! I'll go look for him on the stairs, and you'll sit in ambush at night!
Run quickly to the sick, otherwise they will recover!
Are you out hunting for someone, or are you just walking around with an enema?
Dear friends! You can’t imagine how hard it is for me to combine three great titles: bastard, fascist, and head of your internship! But it was a lyrical introduction! Let's summarize your competition...
With every subsequent second I want to kill you even more. Run Levin, run...
Quotes from Bykov about his interns - What impudence! How dare you call my intern a doctor?!
Before your punitive squad begins its outrages in the territories entrusted to me... I want to remind you of the most important rule: you are foreign bodies in a healthy medical body.
Levin, you are a brainless ciliate, inflated with self-importance... An armless embryo with honors.
He can't answer you, he's busy, he's dying.
Well, have you sharpened the ax of your stupidity?
If we don't cure it, we'll open it up. Right?
So what about the flayers? How many living souls were lost during the night?
Well, let’s say that Lobanov’s wife is a prostitute... But the prostitute’s husband, Lobanov, is nonsense!
No manicure, no conscience...
Well, nurses with diplomas, who wants to go home?... Great, today your home will be the emergency department.
Come on, Lobanov, and buy yourself some brains or a book with this money. But it’s better to read a book, because your brain may reject your body!
Well, before you start killing people, listen to me.
Levin, are you a moron? No not like this. You're a moron, Levin!
Congratulations, colleague, today you opened your cemetery.
Kupitman, you have no conscience, like a fly maniac!
Romanenko, while you’re thinking, I’ll tell you a funny story: They call me from the operating room and say, we’ve already started the operation and there’s no patient, but don’t rush, we’ll cut the air for now
Forget about the color of your diplomas and the fact that the word “doctor” is written on them - this is a lie! You don't know a damn thing!
Scary man. He can pierce the carotid artery with an enema!
Yes! So to him! I would also hit him in the groin so that he wouldn’t reproduce!
The fact that you stole powder from your mother and drank beer in the cemetery does not make you a real Dark One. A goth should have darkness in his soul, not in his jewelry. You are still a brat to serve our black-eyed mistress of death.
You are foreign bodies in a healthy body of medicine
Stop putting words into sentences, you won't succeed anyway
Clever quote by Bykov - Turn on logic!
Evona, again the orderlies forgot to close the gates of hell...
Let's quickly evolve to bipedal and follow me!
You blame him for not being sick because of what you know.
Why are we so sad? The whole day has passed and the Nobel committee still hasn’t called us?
It was necessary to think of something like this. At least they were drunk.
Witches and ghouls - a coven on duty. Whoever is last takes out the ducks!
In two minutes, the investigation, trial and execution will take place in the staff room. Faster boobies, faster!
The selection includes famous statements, quotes and phrases by Bykov - Andrei Evgenievich Bykov, role played by Ivan Okhlobystin, TV series “Interns”
Boris Levin
Boris Arkadyevich grew up in an intelligent family, which is why he is distinguished by his good manners and courtesy. Judging objectively, Levin is the most well-read and educated intern who shows good results in medical practice. And everything would be fine, if not for one thing: inflated self-esteem and boasting. It was these two negative qualities that gave Bykov the opportunity to come up with the most merciless insults for Levin:
Smart doctor with glasses? In my department? Who let you in?
Levin, among the things that really interest me in life, the question of your personality development is somewhere between the problems of migration of the long-eared owl and the peculiarities of taxation in the Congo.
- And you, Doctor Lenin, why didn’t you raise your hand? - And I’m not Lenin! - So you’re not a doctor.
Levin, are you a moron? No not like this. Levin, you are a moron!
You can't hit doctors! He is allowed (points to Levin), but doctors are not allowed!
Levin, you are a brainless ciliate with an inflated ego. An armless embryo with a red diploma.
Sorry, Lobanov, the palm of stupidity goes to Levin. He deserved it.
Levin, let's take the ball and go play football. You still have nothing to do. You just have a patient wake up after anesthesia.
Cool phrases from Dr. Bykov
- 100
The series Interns is very successfully broadcast on television channels; it has become very popular thanks to the successfully selected actors of the series and largely thanks to
the cool phrases of Dr. Bykov
. These phrases make you smile and are quoted. Almost every word of Dr. Bykov is a masterpiece of humorous art, and considering the facial expressions with which this phrase is pronounced, it’s garbage. Some say that Interns are our answer to Dr. House. But, in my opinion, Dr. House is “smoking nervously on the sidelines.” I suggest you read a selection of cool PHRASES OF DOCTOR BYKOV and compare them with cool phrases of Dr. House. And so... Rule number one: forget about the color of your diplomas and the fact that the word doctor is written there - this is a lie, you don’t know shit! Rule number two: until you here start killing people for me, I forbid you to prescribe anything, advise or touch my patients with your hands, without my permission, but my colleague, as a particularly experienced one, I allow you to take out the ducks on your own))) Bykov to Lobanov: - Everyone, prepare the patient for discharge! - So, how about discharge?! - So, to check out! Or don't you know how to do it? Has anyone ever left you alive? "What a cheek! How dare you call my intern a doctor?!!” “Stop putting words into sentences, you won’t succeed anyway.” How will he answer you? He is busy! He is dying! “Well, executioner, have you sharpened the ax of your stupidity?!” - It’s not me, it’s you who blame him, that he’s sick not because you know! Woman, groin, razor...Do you feel the level of danger?
-Exercise! Lobanov, you are going to the dermatovenerology department, I gave you to Dr. Kupitman today. -What does it mean “you gave me to the doctor Buy You foreign bodies in a healthy body of medicine” “For the work of the flayers” “Well, now I understand who is the head of the department here, and who “Hey, you... white-haired woodpecker, get out of the way?” Nod if you understand...see you soon." Levin - should I go work in the morgue? Bykov - I had no choice. You cannot be trusted alive. -Andrey Evgenievich, can I go to the funeral today? -It’s early. I’ll tell you when it’s time! -My husband died and today is the funeral, why did I end up with you! -Ahh...Well then, of course! -Thank you. I never thought that venereologists also look into people’s eyes”)))) - I’ll take one. - Why? Tired of checking with the mirror??
Bykov: “And here’s my favorite:” Levin: “entry number 17:” Bykov is a scoundrel, a bastard, a creature, a brute……. bitch Bykov: “Here’s a saucepan for you, here’s a wall for you...”:) Venereologist: “The doctors have gone crazy, they don’t use protection anymore” :)))) - What is this????? -This, this, sorry!!!!! -You broke IGOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (About a flower) The intern comes with an enema, Bykov tells him: “Are you hunting someone here or are you just out for a walk?” -go get some Vaseline... -no, Semyon, let's remain only friends)))) - Andrey Evgenievich... Intern Lobanov was diagnosed with a terrible disease - systemically muscular ichthyosis of the shleimon))... - Wow, and where did he contract this monstrous non-existent disease? - In my department, when I touched a patient with chickenpox with my bare hands =)... - Hmm... I see... are you playing pranks?! - I have no time for pranks... I need to save the guy... - Uh-huh... have you already figured out how? - Here is an irritating erectile suposetolia - suppositories with pepper =)) - Use logic! (favorite phrase of A.E. Bykov) - Can I help you? — I always dreamed of hearing this from a venereologist. He’s generally so stupid.. — What, even dumber than you? - Yes, we will quickly evolve to erectus and follow me! Come out, come back to consciousness and come back in again! There's a corpse running around our hospital! I'll go look for him on the stairs, and you'll sit in ambush at night!
If we don't cure it, we'll open it up. Right? Well, okay, if paranoia has let you go, it’s a sin for me not to let you go. Lobanov, you have one idiotic habit - you judge people by yourself. You just can’t understand that you are in a place where all the people are much smarter than you…. -What was your mistake? - What we took into the elevator... - No, when you submitted documents to the medical institute. So you will work together: you and Nikolai Semenovich’s intestines Yes, I’m lying, but I’m not exaggerating, I’m understating
You are not Doctor Varvara, you are Doctor Barbarian... - Well, you have humor, Andrey Evgenievich. - I’m proud of myself. - I’ll kill her... Will you help me hide the body?... Well, in general, forget it. - Well, nurses with diplomas, who wants to go home?...Great, today your home will be the emergency department. - And you, Doctor Lenin, why didn’t you raise your hand? - And I’m not Lenin. - So you’re not a doctor. — Andrey Evgenievich, I want to be a doctor. - A female doctor is not even funny. It’s interesting to burn cats. - What am I supposed to do? - Change your gender and come Levin: the strongest muscle in the human body is the tongue Lobanov: Borya, if you don’t shut up, I’ll tear it out for you
- There are so many normal doctors in the hospital, but we got this bastard! - I love you too, Lobanov!!! Dear friends, you have no idea with what difficulty I manage to combine three great titles at once: bastard, fascist and head of your internship. An honorable 2nd place is awarded to intern Lobanov and he is awarded a course of intravenous magnesium so that he can quickly recover from the concussion he received. And 1st place is awarded to his faithful friend, the cunning Romanenko, and he is awarded night duty... Bykov: - Lobanov, are you an idiot? No not like this. - You're an idiot, Lobanov!! Bykov: - Lobanov, what’s the problem? - What makes you think that I have a problem? - Lobanov, you’re Lobanov, you must have a problem!! Lyuba: - Well, they sent the scumbag himself!! also: - Congratulations, colleague, today you opened your cemetery. (Andrey Evgenievich to intern Lobanov.) - I got hard in the morgue! - Happens! - No, the corpse has stood up! (Levin to Bykov) - Before your punitive squad begins its outrages in the territories entrusted to me... I want to remind you of the most important rule: you are foreign bodies in a healthy medical body. (Head of the department. Bykov to interns) - If anyone says good morning, I will kill him. (Bykov) - Have you heard that chewing gum was invented? (Bykov to Kupitman) - Good morning, Andrey Evgenievich!...The head doctor is calling you. - This phrase must be pronounced without smiling. (Bykov on duty) - Today is my dressing day, and the sick are like fools at a rally. (Luba). - Levin, you are a brainless ciliate, inflated with self-esteem... An armless embryo with honors.
- Cognac? To me? …For the first time that day I hold something pleasant in my hands. (Lobanov at the reception instead of the venereologist). “Here’s a cognac with the wonderful name “Cognac.” - Why do you hate me so much? - This is a long conversation, let's get to the point. (Varya with the head of the department). — Witches and ghouls, the coven is on duty. Whoever is last takes out the ducks. (note from Bykov). - To me, my children, to me. Otherwise, the sick will recover on their own. - Lobanov, why are you so solemn, it’s too early for the wake. Your patient, no matter what, may still recover. “And I agreed not because of the money, but because the doctor must help the patient.” This is a hospital. (Lobanov - when a VIP patient ordered a prostitute into his ward). — I can’t help but ask the venereologist, did you wash your hands? (Andrey Evgenievich Kupitman). - Let's break up, I don't love you. Anyway, why smear the snot. (Levin is sick with a gunshot). - Why did you pick it up from the circus? - I won't run again. - No need, this one is funny. Suitable...Leave the gurney, we'll figure something out with it. (Lobanov brought the whore to the hospital). - How long will you continue to irritate me with your illegitimate presence? - Which one? - Get out of here. (When a prostitute was kicked out of the ward). - What, there was nothing else to vacuum? Have you found the dustiest place? (Semyon Lobanov - a patient with a hose on his penis).
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Gleb Romanenko, or “kala bear” Bykov
Gleb is the son of the chief doctor, as well as a noble partygoer and rogue. He cleverly knows how to shirk work, finding awkward and ridiculous excuses for his idleness. Romanenko is a smart guy, but because of laziness, he received not only a significant portion of “compliments” from the head of the department, but also the offensive nickname “kala bear.”
And I always said, Romanenko, that carrying weights is your true calling. Come on, take me to the laboratory.
- Romanenko, my little “kala bear”! — Why “kala”? Koala! - Doesn't matter.
Good morning, colleagues! And you, Pinocchio!
Romanenko, are you hunting for someone, or did you just go out for a walk with an enema?
Romanenko is a waste material, domestic, but of low quality.
By the way, it was the expression “bear poop” that became popular among the people faster than all the others. Bykov never gave an exact answer to what exactly he meant by this nickname. Viewers began looking for photos of “poo bears” on the Internet and asking questions on forums, but an unambiguous wording has still not been found.
There are two common interpretations. The first is Romanenko’s external similarity to a koala, because he is just as clumsy and slow. It is possible that Bykov simply forgot the name of this bear, which is why he called Gleb not a koala, but a “kala bear.” The second version is not so harmless. Some viewers suggested that Andrei Evgenievich deliberately called Gleb “feces bear,” since feces in medicine is the name given to natural human waste. If we take into account Bykov’s love for this kind of insult, then, most likely, he was guided by precisely this interpretation.
The Prosecutor General's Office is asked to check the statements of Dmitry Bykov
Bloggers who call themselves bearers of patriotic views write en masse to the Prosecutor General's Office and the Investigative Committee with a request to verify the statements of the writer Dmitry Bykov about General Andrei Vlasov and the Second World War.
Speaking in December in St. Petersburg at the “Amateur Readings” conference, Bykov, in particular, said that he intended to write a book about the commander of the Russian Liberation Army during the Second World War, General Andrei Vlasov, who was convicted and executed after the war in the USSR on charges of treason. According to Bykov, the only true patriot is the one who is in absolutely orthogonal contradiction with today's Russian patriotism. Today, to be a patriot means to be a Russophobe.
In addition, Bykov said that the Nazi extermination of the Jews turned large sections of Soviet society away from supporting Hitler during World War II:
Unfortunately, the Russian civil war of the 1940s included the near-mass extermination of Jews. And those who were going to live in a free Russia liberated by the Nazis were forced to agree that the Jews were completely exterminated in the territory controlled by the Nazis. I think no one was ready to buy Russian happiness at such a price.
The full speech can be viewed at the following link:
Ural blogger Sergei Kolyasnikov, known for his pro-Soviet views, compiled a template for an appeal to the Prosecutor General’s Office with a request to verify the writer’s statements, in which he saw signs of violations of Article 354.1 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation “Rehabilitation of Nazism.”
According to the Tsargrad TV channel, “social network users staged a kind of flash mob, flooding the online reception with complaints demanding that the poet Dmitry Bykov be brought to justice.” A number of pro-Kremlin media outlets, such as Komsomolskaya Pravda, also criticized Bykov.
A member of the Krasnoyarsk regional committee of the Communists of Russia party, associate professor of the Siberian Federal University Dmitry Moiseenko wrote a statement against Bykov to the Investigative Committee, Sibir.Realii reports.
Social media users leave different comments about this. There are those who support Dmitry Moiseenko. Others call his statement to the Investigative Committee a “denunciation.” Some also point out that the statement that gave rise to the statement was taken out of the context of Bykov’s entire speech, and the quotes in the appeal to the department were given with distortions. At the same time, later in the same speech Bykov says that Hitlerism is, in fact, “zoological nationalism.” And the Soviet people defeated fascism thanks to the “spirit of internationalism.”
Bykov himself previously explained his speech, saying on the air of Echo of Moscow that it was dedicated to the problem of the civil war in Russia, which, according to the writer, continues in society in one form or another: “Russia constantly returns to this, continuously rehearses the revolution , is constantly in a state of civil war. And he redoes it all the time. Let's find a way of life in which collective labor, and not collective extermination, could become our main business. To do this, we need to agree on some basic things, and that’s all.”
Bykov has not yet commented on the latest wave of appeals to the prosecutor’s office. Officials, including representatives of the Prosecutor General's Office, have not yet commented on the situation.
- Dmitry Bykov is a writer, poet, publicist, author of literary biographies of Boris Pasternak and Bulat Okudzhava. He was a member of the organizing committee of the “For Fair Elections” rallies in 2011–12.
- In 2015, the Dozhd TV channel was expelled from a number of cable networks after a survey appeared on its Twitter on the topic of the siege of Leningrad. A number of officials sharply criticized the channel.
Varvara Chernous
Young, beautiful, but stupid and unpromising, Varvara Nikolaevna became the main object of Bykov’s ridicule. He sincerely believed that a woman could not be a doctor, and intern Chernous every time confirmed this belief in practice:
— A female doctor? Let's not work together! - So what should I do? - Change your gender and come.
Varya, if you pay a lot of attention to one patient, then you may not have time for another.
Here, Chernous, is your patient Stakhantsev. Sorry, Stakhantsev. I had no other choice.
Chernous, the doctor’s head must work completely, and not just the lacrimal glands.
If anyone finds a small lump the size of a cat's poop, please return it to Dr. Chernous. This is her brain.
BYKOV DMITRY: CAPacious QUOTES FROM WORKS
Teaching fiction writer and journalist Dmitry Bykov is an amazingly shameless Russophobic creature who lives on our Russian soil. In fact, all of his poems, articles and novels are thickly flavored with outright hatred of Russia. Bykov's hostility towards Russia knows no bounds. In fact, no matter what he writes about, he always slides into this crooked plane, he writes only about this. Everything in Russia evokes unbridled anger in Bykov. There is no such disgusting thing that he would not attribute to the Russians. They, according to Bykov, are by nature stupid, bloodthirsty and dishonest, and there is a swamp in their souls. Therefore, today's Russia is truly worthy of contempt and pity. In the mind-blowing view of Dmitry Bykov, Russia is such a lousy, teary beast on crooked legs, which, in order to look decent, must periodically eat its offspring. And in fact, here Dmitry Lvovich from the Zilbertrud family is not joking at all. Bykov sometimes finds an outlet and escape from wild Russia by working as a guest teacher at municipal universities and private colleges in some tiny American towns. But even there, giving lectures on Russian literature, Dm. Bykov, without a twinge of conscience, vilifies domestic writers and poets who in some way do not correspond to his aesthetic taste as an orthodox liberal. Due to an obvious misunderstanding, Dmitry Bykov is considered the “golden pen of Russia” (since 2010).
To illustrate the Russophobic nature of Dmitry Bykov’s literary and journalistic activities, we present a short set of quotes from his works. The list was compiled by domestic writer and critic Natalya Vorontsova-Yuryeva [https://samlib.ru/w/woroncowajurxewa_n/]. For such vile statements in Rus', writers were always beaten in the face.
***
TODAY'S RUSSIA IS WORSE THAN FASCISM
1) Today’s Russia is sickening, stuffy, unbearable to itself. Pushing someone who is falling is the norm, insulting a woman, a disabled person, or a child is the norm; murder is valor, mercy is cowardice. (Dm. Bykov “Feeling of the enemy”).
2) Today's Russia seems to many to be a more pressing threat than fascism of old. (Dm. Bykov “On the threshold of the Middle Ages”).
3) One of Russia’s important missions in the world is a demonstration of stupidity and doom (Dm. Bykov “Sleep Over, Artist”)
4) Today's Russia shows fantastic examples of conformism, deceit, cowardice, weakness, surrender of everything that it managed to preserve in the storms of the early market (Dm. Bykov “Russia - a totalitarian country?”).
5) There is absolutely nothing to love today’s Russia. (Dm. Bykov “On the threshold of the Middle Ages.”).
6) Today's Russia is truly worthy of contempt and pity. (Dm. Bykov “On the threshold of the Middle Ages.”).
7) In today’s Russia there is absolutely nothing to die for (Dm. Bykov “Fornication of Labor”).
BEING A PATRIOT OF LICEY RUSSIA IS UNTHOUGHT
You can’t look at this Motherland without tears, and when asked to show her pedigree, it always turns out that when she stopped being so lousy, and her eyes were less watery, and her paws began to walk smoothly, it was bought at the price of the same event: she began eat her offspring and, due to this, looked decent for some time. (Dm. Bykov “Chronicles of the Nearest War”)
9) The Russian state stubbornly did everything possible to make loving the Motherland as difficult as possible for a decent person, if not completely unthinkable. (Dm. Bykov “The desire is gone”).
10) To say “I love my country” means to say “Beat the Jews” or “I approve of the special operation in Chechnya.” (Dm. Bykov “Tendencies. Disqualification”).
11) The main feature of the Russian state is the self-inflicted torture of its people, and the main feature of the people is hatred of their state (Dm. Bykov “Chronicles of the Nearest War”)
BEING RUSSIAN IS DISGUSTING
12) To be Russian from the point of view of Hottentot patriots today really means to be the most disgusting, and few people are able to convincingly object to them. (Dm. Bykov “Brikolage / Why is Russia needed?”)
13) A modern Russian has almost nothing to respect himself for - there is nowhere to turn around, there are no great tasks, at work slavery is worse than Soviet slavery... (Dm. Bykov “Not Toys”)
14) A person with convictions and strong moral principles is as rare in Russia as a gold nugget. (Dm. Bykov “Boris Pasternak”).
15) The combination of purity and fidelity is indeed a rarity in Russia at any time (Dm. Bykov “Boris Pasternak”).
16) I don’t think it’s so good to be like Russia if you are a private person (Dm. Bykov “Instead of Life”).
17) In Russia it is not enough, and sometimes even harmful, to be good. (Dm. Bykov “Two Chekhovs”).
18) To live with Russians is to howl in Russian (Dm. Bykov “The Adventures of the Good Soldier Hasek during the Third World War”)
19) Everything that is bad for other living species is good for the mushroom. This also makes him similar to the Russian person, for whom everything that is great for a German is death (Dm. Bykov “Russian Mushrooms”)
RUSSIA STATE MANAGERS ARE Scum
20) To say “I am a statesman” means to sign that human life is worth nothing to you (Dm. Bykov “Tendencies. Disqualification”).
21) In today's Russia it is a shame to support power. (Dm. Bykov “Loyalty as a tragedy”)
22) I generally hate it when Putin is praised avidly - this, of course, is also disgusting, but this, as a rule, is done by people from whom you don’t expect anything good. (Dm. Bykov “Putin is like a good man”)
23) We have sincere anti-statists, but there are almost no sincere statists - precisely because neither talent nor real devotion to the Russian state is needed (Dm. Bykov “House without an elevator”)
24) Why are decent people in Russia always oppositionists, and scumbags always statists? (Dm. Bykov “Fornication of Labor”)
25) The Russian statesman always wants blood, executions, deaths, disasters and repressions. (Dm. Bykov “Chronicles of the Nearest War”)
26) A talented person in Russia is doomed to go into opposition, and every bastard will certainly get involved in statism. (Dm. Bykov “Boris Akunin “Falcon and Swallow”)
27) State officials must be killed. (Dm. Bykov “Chronicles of the Nearest War”)
RUSSIA IS A GRAVE, MEANINGLESS and CHECKISTS
28) Russia by its nature is a graveyard of global ideas and ambitious plans. (Dm. Bykov “Island of Holy Russia”)
29) Russia seems to have been deliberately created by God in order to serve as a grave for supermen and superhumans - and if it weren’t for her, they would, for goodness sake, actually take over the world (Dm. Bykov “Island of Holy Russia”)
30) The main features of Russia are contempt for the law, the complete lack of rights of some, the unlimited arbitrariness of others and deep mutual satisfaction with this harmonious state (Dm. Bykov “The Extraordinary Adventures of an Italian in Russia”)
31) Russia is a huge space, merciless to people. (Dm. Bykov “Space of polemics. My honest Motherland”).
32) Russia consists of security officers who have no one to hunt, and as a result they strive for power, hunting everyone (Dm. Bykov “Fornication of Labor”).
33) The meaning of life in Russian conditions lies in its meaninglessness, (Dm. Bykov “Leymogonnaya Russia, or Praise to Drizdezh”)
34) The main trick of Russia is that it is not needed by anyone except the indigenous population and is not suitable for anyone. All the talk that they want to pump our oil out of us, that China is pressing us from the East, and NATO from the West, is only needed by wretched idiots who scare us with various phantoms, so that we tolerate them and mistake them for ideologists (Dm. Bykov “ Woe to the conquerors")
NATIONAL HERO OF RUSSIA – EMPTINITY and BLACK PLACE
35) All attempts to discover a national hero through opinion polls reveal a picture so frightening that the country begins to look like a hopelessly lost place. (Dm. Bykov “Experience on a shift”).
36) Our national - and lyrical - hero, as a rule, turns out to be a person who does not look into himself, but when he looks, he sees emptiness, an abyss, the absence of any foundations. (Dm. Bykov “Experience on a shift”).
THE NATIONAL IDEA OF RUSSIA IS CANNIBALITY
37) Russia cannot have a national idea - and no idea at all: the only form of its implementation is not joint work for the good of society, but the destruction of half of this society. (Dm. Bykov “Leymogonnaya Russia, or Praise to Drizdezh”)
38) One of the main Russian national ideas has always been seductively simple and seemingly easy to implement: let’s destroy part of the population, this specific one, and our life will become excellent (Dm. Bykov “On That Only One”)
LIFE IN RUSSIA – LIES, HUMILIATION, NAZISM, HERESY, DEATH
39) The Motherland loves us submissive, sacrificial, or better yet dead (Dm. Bykov “The Desire Is Lost”).
40) Life in Russia involves daily humiliation, receiving stupid certificates, insurmountable fears, kowtowing to superiors of all ranks (even if you understand their insignificance) (Dm. Bykov “Space of Polemics”)
41) In Russia... what is in demand is not honesty or sincerity, but precisely the ability to lie, toady, drag and not let go. (Dm. Bykov “House without an elevator”)
42) In today's Russian society - again on all levels - there are enough real signs of Nazism. (Dm. Bykov “Extraordinary Fascism”)
43) Only in Russia does heresy constantly become the dominant religion (Dm. Bykov “Boris Pasternak”).
44) Russia, it seems to me, is not an ideological country at all: neither beliefs nor the fact of their existence are valued here. (Dm. Bykov “Heir in a straight line”).
45) Meaningful and paid work, self-government, trust - the three pillars on which his system stood, accepted throughout the world, but spat upon at home (Dm. Bykov “Flags without a tower”).
46) But the trouble with Russia is that it has never been able to listen to smart people (Dm. Bykov, “In Memory of a Complex System”).
47) All over the world, mercy is a sign of strength, and only in Russia it is considered a sign of weakness (Dm. Bykov “Too Human”)
48) Russia was a gendarme for the whole world, and an overseer for its own population. (Dm. Bykov “The desire is gone”).
49) Everything in Russia was done without love, under duress, for survival (Dm. Bykov “Fornication of Labor”).
50) Russia has not stood on ceremony with its own people for a long time, speaks to strangers without any respect, and all this will last until alternative energy sources appear. (Dm. Bykov “Brikolage / Why is Russia needed?”)
51) In Russia... every person is a wolf, a traitor and a competitor to another. (Dm. Bykov “From scratch”)
52) Not a single code of honor takes root in Russia, (Dm. Bykov “Boris Akunin “Falcon and Swallow”)
53) Only cowardice, fatalism, and an unsteady swamp in their souls can explain the fact that Russians still go to church and sometimes speak respectfully of hierarchs” (Dm. Bykov “Clean foreheads”)
RUSSIA – BRAKE, SWAMP, DEAD-END
54) Russia is a brake, an eternal “speed bump” on the way to any progress (Dm. Bykov “Brikolage / Why is Russia needed?”)
55) She (Russia - approx.) does not need any ardent faith, no moral code, no progress (Dm. Bykov “Basmannaya Philosophy.”)
56) Our country today enjoys in the world - and completely deservedly - the glory of a certain swamp, a septic tank, a dead end, which is pointless to reform, and all this is so... (Dm. Bykov “Praise to the showcase”).
57) Chaadaev ... did not have time to appreciate the eternal advantage of Russia - a country in which nothing began and everything got stuck. (Dm. Bykov “Basmannaya Philosophy”)
RUSSIA'S DESTINY IS TO DISAPPEAR INTO MANURE
58) The project called “Russian Empire” is a thing of the past. This country does not need not only smart liberals, but also smart patriots. Can I tolerate this swamp? (Dm. Bykov “Chronicles of the Nearest War”)
59) One of my friends once said that it would be better if there were no Russia (Dm. Bykov “Brikolage / Why is Russia needed?”)
60) Sooner or later, Russia will simply cease to exist, and then – I would like to believe – something fundamentally new will begin on its ruins (Dm. Bykov “Chronicles of the Nearest War”)
61) Russia, in general, has a very small choice: either sit in the manure and smell a rose, or sit in the manure without a rose (Dm. Bykov “Chronicles of Russian Castalia”).
62) Bringing Russia into divine form is a task as overwhelming as the destruction of the Great Wall of China. (Dm. Bykov “Zoo Life / Where are citizens of the Russian Federation registered?”)
63) If you think about it, rebuilding Russia is elementary - it’s enough to complete at least one project, European or Asian (sometimes it becomes indifferent which one, as long as it’s finalized); there is a great chance that then we will finally have a normal army, government, industry... (Dm. Bykov “On the fortieth anniversary of one polemic”).
RUSSIAN CIVILIZATION – HATE AND IMMORALITY
64) The Russian model of society is the Kabanikha family (a sadistic tyrant - approx.), where they don’t drink enough food or drink Pobeda gin, but the elders despise the younger ones, and the younger ones hate the older ones, where everyone lies to each other and does not profess any general morality, where they will not stand up for the humiliated, but will secretly slip him candy. This cannot be called a deficiency—or lack—of civilization; it is simply a civilization whose main principle is complete immorality. (Dm. Bykov “Orwellian Insufficiency”)
Ivan Natanovich Kupitman
Kupitman is a venereologist, an alcoholic, a ladies' man and the best friend of the head of therapy. Twenty years of friendship was not complete without comic insults and mockery from Bykov:
Kupitman! Compared to you, I'm a baby with a pink bottom.
Vanya, you have no conscience, like a sailor’s fly!
Natanovich invites everyone to his birthday! This means that even such trash as you.
In order to correct your happy face, Kupitman, I will remind you of something. It’s 9:30 in the morning, you’re a venereologist, and ahead of you is an examination of an ocean of infectious pussies.
Natanovich! Don't be upset about being called grandpa. You look more like your grandmother.
Vania! Your computer is full of viruses! You're a venereologist!
