We are constantly afraid of any change. They make us nervous because they bring with them something unfamiliar and unknown. However, changes in life are definitely a plus. This is a new beginning, a new moment, a new period of life to evaluate who you are and who you want to become. Here are at least 10 reasons not to be afraid of change, but to welcome it joyfully.
Get out of the stagnation zone
It is very difficult to leave the zone of your usual living space, in which you feel safe and easy. After all, in the comfort zone a person is psychologically protected.
When you step out of your comfort zone on your own, it motivates you to make new decisions and helps you set new goals and ways to achieve them.
One way to get out of your comfort zone is to start speaking publicly. Yes, for almost all of us this is scary to do. There are only a few born speakers.
Just sign up for a public speaking course . Everyone is new there and supports each other. To begin with, you will perform in pairs, it’s not that scary. By the end of 3-4 lessons you will enjoy it, fear will be minimal.
Only upon completion of the first speech in front of even a small audience will the feeling of pride from overcoming your fear go off scale.
Make a list of uncomfortable things that you have dreamed of doing, but are very afraid to do. Write the list in a notepad and do it.
Never stop leaving your comfort zone throughout your life and constantly challenge yourself. This makes life more interesting, richer and more meaningful. After 1-2 years of mild stress, it will be a pure pleasure to practice this.
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Do you want to change your education?
You study at the university and understand that this specialty is very far from you, that it is not yours! So, change it! This may not sound entirely serious, but you just need to decide what you need.
For example, you are studying to become a lawyer, and you understand that you would like to be a specialist in another field. For example, you would like to be a designer. Just don’t rush to leave the institute, think about everything carefully first. You can get 2 higher educations at the same time, or you can first get one and then a second education.
Do you want to change your appearance?
Wonderful! Change it! Change and don't be afraid of anything! You've always dreamed of dying your hair bright red, but for some reason you still haven't been able to do it. But in vain, you lose a lot. When you realize your sometimes strange, bold and important desires, you immediately see how your life, in particular your view of the world, changes. The view of the world becomes somehow bolder and more confident.
By realizing your desire to change your life, you will see how your life, mood, and attitude towards the world and people will change. The main thing is not to regret it later! But you won’t regret it if your desire to change something is carefully thought out.
Accept yourself as you are
Who can change your life? Only you! Neither a work colleague, nor a roommate - only you. To change in life you need to love yourself. Such/Such yourself as you are.
In life you will meet people who will not like you. There will be people who will refuse. It doesn’t matter what they refuse: love or help.
And accepting who you are, loving yourself - this will help you move on and live on .
When you suppress yourself, constantly criticize, compare, underestimate, it only leads to dissatisfaction.
It’s hard to do - to find the courage and love yourself, to do something crazy. You will do such an act when you stop paying attention to who and what thinks about you .
Act as your heart tells you, as you see fit. Act on it and create a life you enjoy.
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“What is good for a Russian is death for a German”
No, we don’t wish death on anyone just because things are bad right now. We suggest you think: is everything really that bad? Agree, it’s not very often that situations happen when a legless disabled person with 10 children and a wife with cancer finds himself homeless on the street due to loan debts. Usually we are upset by much less significant events: a disagreement with a loved one, parental dissatisfaction, problems at work, lack of money, etc.
In psychology there is such a thing as “imposed values.” Family, parents, society impose on people certain patterns of behavior and standards, what is good and what is bad. If you leave crime and hygiene alone, then in everything else you have the right to decide for yourself what is good for you and what is not. And then you will immediately see how much the number of reasons you have to consider yourself a failure has decreased.
You don't have to want to have a career like your parents would have. In this context, dismissal ceases to be a problem, because you personally are quite happy with working from home, and your profession as a programmer or designer allows it. You don’t have to want to get married at 22, and if a disagreement with a young man upset you only because your mother sees him as a worthy groom and again begins to rant about “I want grandchildren” - let your mother pay attention to your dad. You can always find words to tell your mother about this gently and tactfully. And not only mom. In general, realize your life goals and stop making excuses for it.
Live an active life
No one lives under the illusion that health will be the same as in youth. Years pass, physical health changes, emotional state and mental balance also undergoes changes.
We have control over the nutrition of the body and brain.
10 changes to a healthier, more balanced lifestyle will help you become more resilient to the physical changes in your body.
Any exercise, even regular morning exercises, is a great way to achieve positivity and optimism in life. When exercise becomes a habit, it becomes a way of life that leads to a happy and fulfilling life.
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"Smile and wave"
Now you won’t remember where and when you first heard this phrase: in the cartoon “Madagascar”, the film “The Madness of King George” or the song by Alexander Pushny. And we don’t know whether this phrase will help in all the situations faced by the heroes of these wonderful works.
But we know for certain that a person smiles not only when he feels good. The reverse also works: even an insincere and forced smile after a short time makes the brain think that everything is fine with us, hormones of joy begin to be released in the body.
In general, here’s a life hack: if you’re in the worst possible mood, and there are no constructive thoughts about the impending changes yet, occupy your time with something fun. Watch a comedy, read jokes, sing some funny songs at online karaoke. And you will notice that after half an hour of this action you feel better and everything around is not so bad.
And one more point that many people overlook: any comedy, joke, song is almost always some kind of short but instructive story. Think about the meaning and perhaps it will tell you a way out of your situation. In the end, almost everything that happens to us has already happened somewhere and to someone.
"Easy to say"
And “talking is not carrying bags” and other treasures of folk wisdom come to the rescue when a person stubbornly strives to become depressed. To be fair, many conscientious citizens have already tried the previous two tips on themselves. And they didn’t help everyone. Especially if the situation is objectively unpleasant. And if it is also massive, even more so.
Then the compiled to-do lists for the week gather dust without use, the threads for cross-stitching also do not get around to cleaning, and the books, incl. in English, you never opened it. This is also normal. Some recover from stress faster, others more slowly.
If you're the slower type, just leave yourself alone. Well, did you somehow live without macrame and English for the previous 10 years? And even with unpumped abdominals. Here you go another week or two! During this time, you yourself will get tired of being bored and want to do something more interesting than just loiter around and sort through useless thoughts in your brain.
Or maybe you want to reconsider your plans drawn up many years ago and add something more current to them than cross stitch. Then things will go faster, with enthusiasm and pleasure.
Face your fears
Every person has fears inside them. We ignore them, we really hope that they will go away on their own.
They just don't just disappear. To change your life, you will have to learn to manage or dissolve your fears . When you learn to manage them, then fears will no longer control you.
What is fear? These are thoughts that live in the mind, they are not real, you cannot touch them with your hands. And over time, we become so comfortable with them that it seems as if they are real.
Because of fears, we feel dissatisfaction, uncertainty, and dissatisfaction.
Face your fears, regain your ability to choose: how to live, what to desire, what to do. When you understand that fear is only thoughts that can be controlled, then change your life forever.
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Live your life purposefully
Take time and try to figure out what is most important in life and why you think so. Figure out what you want to achieve in life, identify your personal values.
Determine your purpose so you can feel meaning in every moment. Destination will fill you with purpose and give you direction on where to go.
Without meaning, life flows aimlessly. Just living every day, without joy and satisfaction from your own importance.
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Let go of regrets
Remorse and bitterness only hold us back in life, preventing us from moving forward. By focusing on regret, we lose the possibilities of the present and future.
You shouldn’t live in the past; no one has ever been able to bring it back. The best decision is to let go of events that have already happened .
Find a psychologist that is suitable for you, start working with him. First, by eliminating simple irritating factors, then by treating major stresses in life.
People from the post-Soviet world need about 8 years of therapy to remove the burden of the socialist past. [3]
The only thing we can control now is managing the present and the future .
If you have regrets, get rid of them yourself. Try the exercise with plain paper.
Write a regret on each piece of paper. Burn the papers in the park along with sadness, pity, grief, pangs of conscience. The paper, burning and smoldering, will also carry away regret.
Do you think this is child's play? Who are you then, if for many years you cannot eradicate the regrets that prevent you from living? The exercise is effective, it works. But with a psychologist it is more powerful and effective.
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