Psychologists' statements about relationships between men and women

Appreciate what you have

Sometimes people treat each other with deep respect and sincere love. But, unfortunately, this does not always happen. Therefore, unpleasant statuses “if you are not appreciated” are very common.

Here are their examples:

1. In order not to lose a loved one completely, you should simply appreciate his presence every day.
2. If you are not grateful for what they do for you, do not expect anyone to appreciate your actions with gratitude.
3. It is better to be completely alone than to remain day after day with a callous person who does not value you.
4. The beautiful one is not the one who has the most attractive appearance in the world, but only the one who constantly thanks others for what they do for him.
5. Loneliness is not the worst thing in the world. The worst thing in the world is living with someone who doesn't need you at all. .
6. Only those who are not appreciated know how difficult, sad and lonely it is to be with a person who does not love you. And sooner or later such painful feelings will be pushed out into freedom.
7. Now it’s October, which means we should give each other as much warmth as we have. Otherwise, December will come and will not freeze all the feelings that still remain in our hearts.
8. Someone who always feels appreciated will always do much more than is expected of him.
9. Don’t be afraid to give each other warm words and don’t feel sorry for the warmth of your soul. The more wood is added to the fire of your love, the more warmth will return to you from it.
10. Constantly living with someone who doesn't value you at all is like being in a cage with a skunk all the time.
11. There are so many ungrateful people that when you meet a kind person, you no longer believe in his sincerity.
12. The worst thing is to give your feelings to someone who doesn’t need them.
13. It is impossible to give even the most valuable thing to someone who does not need it.
14. Sometimes a person constantly carries terrible pain within himself and endures black ingratitude. And gradually he begins to realize that the love that once captured his entire being is beginning to melt. Then it shrinks, shrinks and disappears forever.
15. Anyone who does not value a lover will soon receive someone who only wants to receive money from him.
16. Don't you need my love and care? Fuck you! If you don't know how to appreciate, sit alone!
17. You forgive a person every day. The next day you forgive again. But he doesn't appreciate it. And finally, you realize that there is no need to say anything. Then you just get up and silently, without saying goodbye, leave forever.

Logic or feelings

Let's continue the topic. Statements about the relationship between a man and a woman are sometimes quite unexpected. John Gray, a psychologist and author of a bestseller about men who came to us from Mars and women from Venus, wrote that earthly women are very similar to their “Venusian great-grandmothers.” How? They feel uplifted and energized when they feel that they are thought about and cared for. If she is deprived of this, then soon expect other feelings - fatigue and depression from unilateral responsibility. In this statement I would like to emphasize words, or rather verbs, such as “feel” and “feel”. They can be combined with any nouns and adverbs, the meaning will always be the same - in life, women are guided exclusively by feelings and emotions, and even more so in love.

For a man, everything is much more prosaic: “He came. Saw. Won". Psychologist Andrei Kurpatov analyzed just one word - “trust.” This is what women associate with the image of an ideal man. For the latter, it causes shock and generally puts him in a state of pronounced internal tension: how can you trust someone? The male brain only knows “rely”, “calculate”, “trust”. A very illustrative example! Wise thoughts about the relationship between a man and a woman are a real treasure trove of useful information...

Appreciate your loved ones before they leave you

Even pets want their love and devotion to be noticed and appreciated by their owner. It happens that an abandoned cat or a dog feeling lonely simply leaves an angry and ungrateful owner and goes in search of a new one. Therefore, when you are not appreciated, status can sometimes shame an ungrateful person and make him realize that his happiness will not last forever.

1. There is no point in the external beauty of people if their soul is black as soot. There is no point in showing kindness if they are not grateful for what is done for them.
2. I'm waiting for you to notice my love and devotion. I don't believe you don't value them that much.
3. Gratitude is the greatest feeling in the world. The more you give, the more it comes back. And it also brings additional benefits.
4. At first you don't love anyone. But then you begin to notice other people’s feelings and realize that there is nothing more valuable in life.
5. Anyone who constantly does not have time for a drop of warmth towards their loved ones will not find in the severe cold anything to warm them up even a little from the wild cold.
6. Selfishness is a good thing. Until you are left alone and realize that everyone who loved you is gone. They didn’t wait for you to stop admiring your person.
7. Anyone who does not value a loved one will soon discover that he lost the most important thing while he was chasing nonsense.
8. Some people think: “The time will come, then I’ll get involved in relationships.” And then it comes and you no longer need to do anything. They remain alone and no one needs their care.
9. We part only once. And we love every day.
10. It’s easier to give your neighbors a little warmth every day than to light a whole fire on a cold day.
11. If you breathe cold on your wife, then sooner or later life will freeze you.
12. Don't destroy love! It cannot be built even from the most valuable materials!
13. Don't cry over the dead! Love the living!
14. The power of one person over another destroys, first of all, the ruler.
15. A person who does not know how to appreciate and care for his loved ones is seriously ill. And such ailment is rarely cured.
16. Don't think of love as hard work. Consider her happiness and she will return everything to you with interest.
17. There is no need to sing serenades at night, It is better not to trample the souls of loved ones with dirty boots.
18. Perhaps I’m too naive, but it seems to me that love can grow even through asphalt. She is like the sun in spring, will melt the soul of an ungrateful person and someday teach him to appreciate warmth.
19. This is just how they say that someone who is angry experiences mental pain. He feels nothing: no pain, no love, no care. One all-consuming egoism.
20. There was so much passion in my soul that I could fill the whole world with it. But she was not appreciated and she gradually, like a stream into a crevice, left my heart. Now it's empty, cold and lonely.
21. A good person will always find a mate, and evil will boomerang back to the bad one and stay with him forever.
22. It is not the one who is unhappy who is not appreciated, but the one who spits in the soul of the lover.
23. When you lose money, bad things happen. When you lose something you didn't value, real disaster happens.
24. There are people who, no matter what, will stay with you through thick and thin. Appreciate them. You won't find others like this anymore.
25. For one, happiness is that he has the strength to take care of his neighbor. And for another it becomes a joy to spit on all the good things that are done for him.
26. I appreciate kindness, gratitude, care. People! Why don't you do the same?!
27. If you don't need me, just tell me. I'll leave. I don't want to be with someone who doesn't love me.
28. Even far from each other, you can appreciate your neighbor. Even close up you can neglect it.

Only numbers

And along the way, a few words about scientific evidence. It turns out that we sleep differently too. Men sleep deeply. Their sleep is comparable to that of a predator—brain activity drops by 70%. A woman's dream is a victim's dream. She is constantly on guard. The electrical activity of her brain drops by only 10%.

We return again to the great writers. Their stories about relationships between men and women accompanied us throughout the entire article. I would like to end with them, or rather, with one of them, and summarize the above. “...Man is the most advanced being...Woman is the most sublime of ideals...He is the brain. She is the heart... The brain gives light, the heart gives love. Light fertilizes, love resurrects. He is strong in mind. She is in tears. Reason convinces. The tears are amazing. A man is capable of everything heroic. A woman - first of all, to martyrdom. Heroism is glorified. Martyrdom exalts...” These words belong to Victor Hugo, and it’s impossible to say better. No matter how different we may be, we are the great unity on which the entire Universe rests and develops.

Quotes about relationships have become especially interesting to Internet users with the growing popularity of social networks. Today, the pages of boys and girls are full of quotes from their idols. Among them are actors, musicians and writers. By the way, one of the most popular authors, whose quotes about men and women are scattered across the Internet, is Paulo Coelho. When it comes to relationships between a man and a woman, it is always a conversation about love.

There is nothing higher than mutual devotion and care

When a person is appreciated and loved, he is ready to move mountains in return. All it takes is a little warmth and gratitude, then his feelings will shine with a new light. And, on the contrary, statuses about not being appreciated indicate that the most passionate feelings fade away without reciprocity.

1. The strong one is not the one who carries a chest of drawers to the 8th floor. The strong one is the one who is able to pull a lonely person out of depression.
2. If you are not valued, nothing else matters much.
3. You shouldn't stay with those who don't care about you. Life is not eternal. Look around. There are a lot of guys out there just waiting for you to let them take care of you.
4. Someday the moment of truth will come. You will wake up and realize that I am not there. Then you will finally appreciate everything I did for you.
5. The greatest and deepest feelings die from indifference and ingratitude.
6. He who shares love with the world receives love from the world at large.
7. While I was with you, you didn't appreciate me. Why now don’t you let me live in peace when I’m happy with someone else?
8. Don't hurt someone who looks into your eyes and sees the whole world there.
9. I am ready to give my life for the one who loves me. I won't lift a finger for someone who doesn't appreciate me.
10. Ingratitude is the sister of betrayal.
11. Appreciate someone who is always on your side. These people were sent to us from above.
12. Don't hide your feelings from people who love you. They are not with you forever.
13. I want to live for the sake of someone who appreciates me, and I don’t want to live next to someone who doesn’t need me.
14. If you don’t show gratitude voluntarily, life will force you to show it. Only it will be too late.
15. He who appreciates others will never be left alone.
16. A smart person appreciates what he has. A fool throws away precious things.

Most of the statements smack of intense sadness. And, indeed, the absence of love is the worst thing that can happen to a person. Therefore, the statuses “you need to appreciate your loved ones” are very important.

Eyes are for men, ears are for women

The well-known phrase that a man is with his eyes should not be taken literally. She only says that when we first meet or in a longer relationship, it doesn’t matter, we are guided by different feelings. The weaker sex, like air, needs admiration. The author of the novel “Three Comrades,” Remarque, said that a woman cannot be metal furniture, and businesslike behavior is not important to her. She is a beautiful flower that needs special care - sunny, sweet words. It is important not to work for her all your life in an angry frenzy, but to say something nice to her every day. It is difficult to disagree with the opinion of the great writer.

What does the stronger sex pay attention to? Wise thoughts about the relationship between a man and a woman know the answer to this question. French writer and literary critic, she loves deeper than “he” because she is blind. And for “him” in love, only colors and forms are needed, “his” feeling requires exclusively “images”. It is impossible to deny that women do not know this truth. They know this because, firstly, this is their essence - to be beautiful, gentle, charming, and secondly - a weapon. A man's fantasy is a woman's best weapon. Yes, the beautiful “Amazon” should not have a club in her hands. Her instrument, as actress Sophia Loren said, is beauty, but without elegance, charm and character it fades.

An innate property of higher animals

Not only psychologists, moralists and researchers of ethical sciences, but also ordinary scientists, in particular zoologists, tried to answer the question of why people do not value good treatment. Thus, Konrad Lorenz, an Austrian zoologist and animal psychologist, shed some light on the cause of human ingratitude. He studied animal behavior for a long time and came to the conclusion that aggression is an innate quality of higher animals.

There is also intraspecific aggression, when representatives of one species attack their own kind when they enter their territory. This behavior helps to survive in the wild.

Causes of human ingratitude

Research by the Austrian zoologist and zoopsychologist Konrad Lorenz can shed light on the cause of human ingratitude. Studying the behavior of animals, he came to the conclusion that aggression is an innate property of all higher animals. In addition, there is intraspecific aggression, when animals of the same species attack their relatives when they wander into their territory. In the wild, this helps them spread evenly throughout their habitat and ensures they have enough food to survive.

What does this have to do with human ingratitude? Here's what: Lorenz discovered that intraspecific aggression is also inherent in people. Without going into details, we can say that we know it better under the name of competition. For example, two shoemakers living on opposite sides of a big city can even be friends. But if one of them opens his shoemaker’s shop next to the other, the struggle to attract clients will immediately begin. Such an act is considered an encroachment on someone else's territory.

So, man is evil by nature, but at the same time, he is a social being. To survive in society, he needs to learn to coexist with his own kind. This is how moral laws, rules of behavior and the like appeared. To reduce aggression in another, people use various symbolic and submissive actions. Remember court etiquette! Moreover, these rules are different for each nation and can sometimes differ radically. We call teaching these unwritten laws education.

The conclusion that arises from the above may, at first glance, seem paradoxical: gratitude, like a good attitude towards someone, is perceived as weakness.

I asked different people the same questions: “What reaction do you expect from a person in response to your good attitude towards him?” and “How will you react if you see someone treating you well?” To the first question, everyone answered approximately the same thing: “I want the person to give at least a smile of gratitude in return.” And on the second: “Of course, I will be pleased, but...” And then there were rational explanations of why a person does not think that he should necessarily do something good in return. For example: “I’ll do something good if I’m interested in him,” or: “I didn’t ask him for this.”

There is an explanation for this too. By doing something good for the sake of another, a person transcends his natural egoism and wants this sacrifice to be appreciated. But when the same person sees a good attitude from someone towards himself, he perceives this as a sign of his superiority. If someone treats me well, then I deserve it. Like this.

This also explains the opposite - the so-called “Stockholm syndrome”, when hostages of terrorists, after staying with them for several hours or days, begin to support the ideas of their tyrants. Here the self-defense mechanism is activated - a person tries to show to the one on whom his life literally depends, his loyalty, humility and what is called “you and I are of the same blood.” Moreover, this is often done completely sincerely and unconsciously. Hence the “national love” for tyrants.