Does love exist at a distance? What do psychologists say?

This is a difficult question that people discuss quite often. Some say that love at a distance is possible and it can even be stronger and more desirable than when loved ones are always together. To support their words, they cite situations where the reason for separation may be a business trip or shift work.

Others believe that love at a distance is doomed. And this is due to the fact that over time a person’s feelings cool down if there is no possibility of frequent communication. People gradually get used to doing without each other, and their feelings fade away.

Is it possible to love from a distance?

Love is a complicated thing. It is not clear how and why our heart chooses a certain person with whom we then fall in love. But what to do if a person falls in love, but cannot be near his beloved, have the opportunity to see and touch him? Will such love really fade away? Not at all necessary. Surely there is at least one couple in your circle who had to pass the test of time and distance, and who now live together and are happy.

People rarely fall in love at a distance. Therefore, it is difficult to give recommendations on how to preserve feelings. Although in the modern world people can fall in love without even seeing each other, thanks to the World Wide Web and social media. networks. And what can we say about concerts, trips, meetings of friends, business trips and so on. Any unexpected meeting can inflame feelings.

Moments of happiness

How wonderful it is to see someone you have missed for so long. Any distance sooner or later shortens - that blissful moment comes when we can hug our loved ones! Statuses about meeting after a long separation.

The best day is a day spent with your loved one. Someday we will have many such days...
A person can become close to you in a matter of hours. And the one who lives next to you all his life may not even recognize your favorite color.
Love is worth the wait. In order not to lose, you just need to appreciate.
No attachments - no suffering!
My soul writes telegrams to me: it’s time to forget, I loved in vain. I'm looking for someone who heals scars, but with the scent of you.
A person cannot move forward if his soul is corroded by the pain of memories.
At arm's length there live people who are simply acquaintances to us... And those whom we love are always insanely far away. Why is that?
Waiting makes you go crazy, but the desire to wait makes you live.
Anyone who has not loved from a distance will not understand what it means to wait...
When you love, any distances don’t count.
When people are separated from each other by crossroads, pain replaces euphoria. And time heals... slowly and harshly, patching wounds without anesthesia.
It’s so terrible when you want to hug a person, but he is far from you... and all you can do is just be bored.
When you love, you are able to wait for more than just measly hours or days. You can wait for years if you know that one day you will be together with your loved one!
Distance is not scary at all - it doesn’t matter to hear each other... People are united by understanding. And the one who is far away, perhaps the closest ones are closer...
I love her, I miss her, I want to hug her, but there is one problem - she is a thousand kilometers away from me. But it's not scary, right?

Psychologists' opinions

Experts believe that it is possible to maintain relationships at the desired level at a distance. But for this you need:

Become true friends for each other. When talking on the phone, you should be able to speak on any topic, and not silently listen to a monologue, sometimes confirming your presence with a dry “yes”, “no”, “maybe”. Brings together live communication;
Look for topics that can bring you closer together and avoid topics that distance you from each other;
Don’t be afraid to add more tenderness and sincerity to your words. Your partner will feel this on a subconscious level;
Find neutral territory where you both feel comfortable meeting.

Distance is not a sentence

Or maybe it’s not as complicated as it seems. Maybe distance is just testing our strength? And those who did not pass this test did not love at all. Could this be so? Maybe yes. VK statuses about distance - express what you think about this.

It’s like you don’t see the person, but your feelings only become stronger.
If a person wants to be close, he will be. Remember this.
How I wish you were near me now...
It doesn’t matter where the person is – nearby or in another city. He is always there if he lives in your heart.
At night I remember you: your smile, your eyes...
It’s a pity that you can’t hug across cities...
I love you not for who you are, but for who I am when you come.
Love at a distance is a gift and punishment in one bottle...
We have passed the test of distance, but it will soon overtake us again...
It's hard when a person is in your head more often than in your life.
If they ask me what hell is, I will answer: “This is the distance between people who love each other...”
The dream gives me a chance to hug you when I dream of hugging you for real...
When you're bored, it feels like someone is eating your soul.
Finally I met my beloved. And now I miss him again and look forward to our next meeting...
Why can't you hug after 1000 km? Why can't I hug you the same way my soul hugs you now?
The one who loves your soul will not leave you. Never.
And even if we fall asleep in different beds, the main thing is that we fall asleep thinking about each other.
I wanted to find someone I could live with, but I found someone I couldn’t live without!
I miss her terribly, but distance won’t break me.
There are meetings in life that connect you forever. And no amount of distance will change that.
Kilometers have nothing to do with it. We decide for ourselves how far away we should be from each other.
There are a thousand roads between us. Between us is heaven and earth. How I live - only God knows... how I miss - only I know.

How to develop relationships

If you met a young man on one of the social networks, corresponded with him for some time and, as a result, realized that you fell in love with him, then what should you do next? How to develop your relationship so that he also has tender feelings for you? Of course, everything is always individual. But there are several tips that will definitely help you in this situation.

Your relationship should be as if you were nearby;
Communication must be sincere. You should not try to pretend to be someone you really are not;
At the first opportunity, try to organize a meeting with your loved one;
Learn to trust each other already at the correspondence stage, before you have yet become a real couple. Without trust, true relationships are impossible.

Key Features in Long Distance Relationships

In the life of two loving people there will definitely be tests of strength. And perhaps the most difficult exam is long-distance relationships. Often a guy and a girl have to live in different cities and enjoy rare meetings once a month, or even less often. What do the statistics say? But here the results are not comforting - almost 90% of feelings fade away without passing the test of strength. However, there are rare exceptions when couples have existed for more than 3-4 years, and their relationship is so strong that they are not afraid of any separation.

How to strengthen feelings during separation.

Separation for lovers is a difficult test. Especially if you are far from each other and there is no opportunity to meet. To prevent your feelings from fading away, remember the following rules:

You need to be honest with your partner and talk about all the events that happen in your life;
If possible, always be in touch with your loved one. Fortunately, modern technologies allow this;
Take every chance to meet your loved one. Let it be just one day, or even just one hour. Doesn't matter. The main thing is that you met. And this meeting will bring you a lot of emotions and lift your spirits.
And again trust. It is important that you can tell your loved one your innermost thoughts. This also brings us closer together.

Be positive!3

Long-distance relationships are sure to appeal to those who love freedom. After all, now you don’t need to account for your every step, expressed emotions, late returns home, etc. You don’t need to burden yourself with everyday problems and family troubles, or listen to complaints. Now you are completely on your own, you don’t even have to clean the apartment and do what your heart desires.

Such freedom-loving people, when starting a long-distance relationship, can feel very harmonious and maintain a fulfilling life. Naturally, such desires are typical for people with a certain psychological makeup; they can be called “birds of free flight.” For each of them, living at a great distance from their partner is an excellent remedy for depression and boredom.

But what should other people do who cannot imagine their life without a loved one nearby and have a very difficult time experiencing long moments of separation.

"Sharp corners"

Speaking about all the possibilities of maintaining feelings at a distance, we cannot help but talk about those moments that prevent you from passing such a difficult test.

We are all human, and we all have our own human needs that require satisfaction. Therefore, the lack of intimacy often pushes people to cheat;
While a loved one is not around, a person needs to adapt to life without him. Therefore, during separation, new acquaintances and new hobbies appear. The manner of communication may change;
The mental anguish of someone who waits can be very strong. He constantly thinks about his loved one, about what he does, who he meets and whether he is cheating;
It can be very difficult when a partner’s communication style changes during separation. For example, when a guy was in the army and he did not have the opportunity to often communicate with his beloved. But there was enough communication with colleagues who were “on the same wavelength” with him. By the end of the separation, her head is full of thoughts about how much he has changed and how he will treat her. And then there is a new style of communication that is difficult for a girl to accept.

In conclusion, I want to say that love at a distance has a right to exist. And you shouldn't be afraid of separation. After all, it is she who can show the seriousness of your intentions regarding a joint future. And you shouldn’t say loud words and oaths. Feelings don't need this. Love can be proven by deeds.

How to build a long distance relationship

Long distance relationships. 25 tips from a psychologist

Maintaining a long-distance relationship requires a lot of effort and patience. Psychologists say that not all people are ready for long-distance relationships. There are two opposing types of people who may behave differently when separated from their partner.

The first type of people can be called reliable. They remain true to their choice and word. They are disgusted to even think about treason and do not allow thoughts of jealousy. Such people are self-sufficient and self-confident. From such people you can hear: “I myself don’t know how to cheat and I don’t intend to, but there is no reason for me to cheat.”

To find out if your partner is thinking this way, look at how he spends time alone. If in his free time he works, is busy with a hobby or his passion, then he is an integral person who does not need anyone’s attention and support.

The second type of people is anxious and requires constant attention to their person. Such people cannot withstand even a short-term ignore, they begin to suspect their partner of cheating and begin to come up with different scenes in their heads. People of this type most often begin to cheat or look for backup options for a possible separation in advance. They do not understand that they will not be able to withstand loneliness for very long, so they are afraid to be alone.

Determine for yourself what type you are and decide whether to start a long-distance relationship.

Should you start a long distance relationship?

To decide whether to start a long-distance relationship, you need to make your choice, and then listen to your partner's choice. You may not always hear the expected answer. Very often people face their partner's fears. However, 3.7% of people in Russia have long-distance relationships. In the US, this number is even higher - 4.3%.

How do they manage to stay “together”? According to modern research, if at least 1 person in a couple belongs to the “reliable” type, then the relationship has a chance of success. However, if both partners are jealous, hot-tempered, anxious, etc., then separation is doomed.

Everything can change, only if there is a desire between two people to keep the relationship at a distance, they can change their behavior and thoughts.

Is it worth starting a long-distance relationship? This is a question that each person must answer independently. Learn to hear your partner and support each other, then you have a chance to maintain your connection and feelings. A long-distance relationship is a serious step, so talk to your loved one and discuss all your fears and worries in advance.

How to maintain a long distance relationship

So, if you have already started a long-distance relationship, then you need to maintain interest in each other and try not to get discouraged.

Psychologists say that the most important mistake in long-distance relationships is the loss of interest in your life. You should not forget that while your partner is not around, you can devote even more time to yourself. Then it will be interesting to communicate with you every day, learn something new, etc. For example, you can go to university, enroll in a class, find a job.

Let's list important tips from a psychologist:

Try to communicate more often. Set up your schedule so that you can call your loved one every day. For example, at a certain time in the morning or evening. Don't forget about video calling and try to use it when communicating, not your phone. Also use correspondence and chat if you live in different time zones. For example, you are already at work, and the guy is just waking up, write him good morning wishes. This way, he will immediately start his day thinking about you. In response, expect the first good night wish. Such favors become very valuable at a distance.
Take care of free communication. Use free WI-FI to communicate on social networks
Send photos of your face often. After a short time, our brain stops remembering the details of a loved one's face. And then he forgets them completely. To avoid being forgotten, try to remind yourself more often.
Send each other gifts. They can be ordered immediately and delivered to your address. What to give a guy was discussed in the previous article
Send letters via mail. Sometimes a handwritten letter is more important than thousands of messages on social networks
Don't make someone jealous
Support the person with kind words: I believe in you, I love you, we can handle this, you will succeed, you’re great, etc.
Share your successes
Try to take up hobbies in your free time so as not to occupy your head with fears and worries
Before separation, give each other something with your own scent. This will help you remember faster and more colorfully, and experience the feeling that you are close again. Our nose and sense of smell are the best way to recall memories.
Don't forget about the sexual side of relationships. Discuss in advance how you will maintain intimacy

So, all this will help you maintain your long distance relationship. However, remember that long-distance relationships always complicate problems, quarrels and resentments. Therefore, always watch your words and treat each other with care. If you feel like you've started to lose touch and become distant, then read on to learn how to maintain a long-distance relationship.

How to save a long distance relationship

It is possible to maintain a relationship at a distance, even if you yourself feel that you have lost interest in the person. To do this, you need to use the following recommendations from a psychologist:

Meet as soon as possible. Research conducted in recent years suggests that long-distance relationships can last up to 3 years, but no more. Therefore, if your separation period is already close to the third anniversary, then think about living together
If you have the choice of meeting 3 times a month for 2-3 days or once every six months, but for a week, then it is better to choose the first option. The more often you are close, the better you will remember each other, the smell of your loved one and pleasant moments. In addition, sex and hugs release the hormone oxytocin, the bonding hormone.
You can save long-distance relationships through communication. It is enough just to stop swearing and become more affectionate. A kind word will help melt the ice in your heart. Remember “your” phrases, “your” song, or some incident from the beginning of a relationship. Sometimes nostalgia works best
Give the person complete freedom. If you have already made a mistake and began to control your partner, demand constant calls, photographs and excuses from him, then give him complete freedom of choice. Now he is angry with you, but if he feels that he has the right to decide for himself, he will most likely understand you and return to his old feelings
Understand yourself. If you're feeling negative in a long-distance relationship, it might just be your problem. Visit a psychologist and ask for help
Start keeping a diary so that you can pour out all negative emotions in a notebook and not on a person.
Set up a neutral meeting place if you live in different countries. Or fly to each other in turns so that no one is offended that he is the only one wasting time and energy
Don't blame a person for working. Firstly, it’s stupid, and secondly, it’s better not to exhaust your partner with constant reproaches
If you suspect your partner of cheating, then try to distance yourself from him. Over time you will find out for yourself whether this is true or not.
If you bombard your partner with messages all day long, then stop doing this and take a break. Don't write to him for 2-3 days and wait for him to write first. Try not to be intrusive or annoying with messages.
Limit your interactions with people who put pressure on you. If your parents or close friends advise you to leave a long-distance relationship, then ask them not to meddle in your personal life
In general, share less information from your personal life with others
Make a calendar with your own hands, in which you will cross out the days until you meet your loved one again
If your partner has financial problems, then help him purchase a ticket, do not refuse the meeting. Read the article “Student discounts on railway tickets”, it will be useful to all students

So, if you use these tips, you will be able to save your long distance relationship. Remember the most important thing: do not waste your nerves and time on imagination and unnecessary worries.

This is life5

How to maintain a long-distance relationship when we are all living people and there are so many temptations around? After all, for an ordinary person, every day is filled with certain circumstances. What if a handsome guy or girl flashes on the horizon? And if even more, they will want to get to know you? Or do you get an offer to go to a party in a club where there are a lot of cute single people? Is it necessary to deny yourself pleasure and, locked within four walls, spend all your free time at home?

You need to understand that a long-distance relationship is not a reason to lock yourself away and ignore communication with friends and acquaintances. But leading a wild lifestyle with all the ensuing consequences is also not the best option. It is important to find a middle ground, for example, if you really want to have fun, then instead of a nightclub, go for a walk in the park or visit the gym.

Psychologists give very important advice - in order to brighten up the worries and blues about the fact that your loved one cannot be with you now, you need to take care of yourself. And it's very tight. Moreover, if the availability of free time allows it. Join the gym, visit a beauty salon, get a beautiful manicure, read a book, teach yourself to run in the morning. Activities like these will not only brighten up your days, but will also help you take care of yourself. If you still doubt that the relationship is not worth your time, read the article.

Remember that you won't have to maintain a long-distance relationship forever. Sooner or later the day will come when you can hug your loved one and never let him go. Such checks will only strengthen your union, after which meetings will be even more desirable and reverent, and feelings will be stronger and sincere.

Message from the Editor

Finding true love is really very difficult. We dream of helping each of you and for this we collect only the most interesting and important information that will help in this difficult matter. In the end, we’ll tell each of you one more piece of advice that will help put your thoughts in order if anxiety arises in your relationship. Write a letter to your loved one, where you describe everything you feel for him, and ask him for the same. Then exchange letters and study them in different rooms. This easy technique works great wonders. This way you can resurrect even the most difficult relationships at first glance.