website of the Gorlovka and Slavic diocese
What can unite the Antichrist and Baron Munchausen, the German anti-fascist preacher and Dante? What's wrong with a frying pan instead of flowers? What do dirty candlesticks remind you of? Read the interview with Archpriest Vladimir Shutov, rector of the Church of the Holy Royal Martyrs. Alexandro-Kalinovo, you’ll find out!
The first thing that came to mind when I began to reflect on the topic of indifference were the words from the Revelation of John the Theologian: “I know your works; you are neither cold nor hot; Oh, that you were cold or hot! But because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spew you out of my mouth” (Rev. 3:15-16). This is a decline of such a degree that it is no longer possible. Indifference is a terrible state. We think: a man killing a man is a sin, it’s scary. Robbed is a sin, scary. Betrayed - same thing. And what’s wrong with indifference? However, it only seems so.
The Polish writer Bruno Jasieński has an unfinished novel, “The Conspiracy of the Indifferent.” It begins with the words of the American poet Richard Eberhart: “Do not be afraid of your enemies - in the worst case they can kill you, do not be afraid of your friends - in the worst case they can betray you. Fear the indifferent - they do not kill or betray, but only with their tacit consent does betrayal and murder exist on earth.” It turns out that if a murder was committed somewhere, there was indifference of a large number of people before it.
Is indifference an innate quality?
Indifference is a quality that characterizes a person as a soulless person who does not pay attention to other people’s troubles, sorrows and experiences. Indifference is an acquired trait.
A person cannot be born indifferent; he becomes this way due to life circumstances, examples and his own judgments. Indifference is considered a conscious refusal to help someone solve issues that do not concern the person or concern them indirectly.
The indifference of one person breeds the indifference of others. For example, someone who was not helped at a difficult moment and showed indifference will do the same to others. Because for many people, on the one hand, it is easier to stay on the sidelines than to shoulder the burden of solving other people’s problems and offering help. On the other hand, if a person was once refused, he will most likely do the opposite and also refuse to help others.
What dangers are fraught with people’s indifference and where does it come from?
The indifference of people has become a real problem in modern society. It permeates representatives of different age and social groups, and is instilled in children.
The child cannot pass by the hungry and helpless kitten; he wants to cuddle and feed him. What does mom do? He pulls the baby by the hand and forbids him to approach the animal because “he has shingles, is homeless, lost, we are in a hurry,” etc. Having heard the same thing twice, the third time this child himself will pass by, repeating his mother’s words in his thoughts. He may be ashamed of himself, but he will try to drown out and forget this feeling.
In the same way, most adults indifferently pass by those who may need help. A person has fallen and lies motionless on the sidewalk or bench. Most people will pretend they didn't notice, or think he was drunk, or were in a hurry to go about their business. And at this time a person could have a heart attack, a blood clot would break off, and for a few minutes he could still be saved. But indifference did not allow this to be done.
Many will pass by if they see a robbery attack, the beating of one person by another or a group of people. “My house is on the edge, I don’t know anything” - it’s always easier to say this and pass by without calling the police or providing help. Or, it is possible that these are criminals who have been wanted for a long time and without success (due to indifference, among other reasons), and the victim will never receive help.
Frying pan against flowers
One of the manifestations of indifference is a lack of attention to each other. We can live in the same family, but not notice each other’s needs, but what we don’t notice can be very important for our loved one. For example, my wife wants me to give her flowers, and I say: well, why do you need them, let me give you a frying pan instead! She's more useful. I buy a frying pan, she smiles, accepts my gift, but she wants flowers. This is also indifference, because you do not pay attention to the person’s needs and desires. You measure it by yourself. I don't need flowers, I'm for a frying pan. It seems like a small thing, but it doesn't lead to anything good. And then children are born in such a family.
I recently attended a meeting of the commission on preventing violence in the family and society. We discussed the problem: one boy in kindergarten behaves very aggressively, and it also turned out that he constantly wants to sleep. They began to question the parents. They say: “What do you want, we come home from work tired, go to bed at eight o’clock, and he watches movies on the Internet until three in the morning.” The boy is five or six years old. The parents believe that there is nothing bad in this situation: after all, they work to provide for him, so that he has everything. The fact that he watches uncontrolled information until three in the morning is normal for them. Who knows what this child saw? Can you be surprised if over time he grows into an antisocial person? What do you want from young people if they grow up in indifferent families?
I don’t know how to bring people out of the lethargic sleep of indifference. It is everywhere, even in small things. Unclean shoes, unkempt clothes, negligence - all this is formed by indifference.
Why is indifference dangerous?
How else is indifference dangerous? The fact that, spreading everywhere, deprives society of humanity and mutual assistance. People are no longer confident that if they are attacked, someone will volunteer to help or call the police. Because most people won't do that themselves.
Nowadays, people would rather take out their phone and turn on the video camera to film the chaos that is happening than to come to the rescue and call others.
By showing indifference, a person loses touch with empathy and becomes an indifferent person. People don’t want to take on other people’s experiences; they envy other people’s joy.
The soil of many sins
Indifference gives birth to the most terrible crimes. Let us remember the acts of the apostles. When Herod killed the first patriarch of Jerusalem, the Apostle James, his subjects did nothing. Herod liked this, and the first persecution of Christians began. If we draw a parallel with what is happening now in our Church, we can see that everything is happening with the tacit consent of many of our fellow citizens. They turn a blind eye to what they do to believers; it doesn’t concern them. For some, this is far away: “When he comes to me, then I’ll think about what to do.” For another, it doesn’t matter, because he doesn’t care about the problems of Christians, he’s not a Christian.
All people, regardless of their religion, need to understand where good is and where evil is. As the apostle teaches: the senses must be “trained to discern between good and evil” (Heb. 5:14). We must be guided not by our momentary principles, but by the categories of eternity. Anyone who lives like this cannot be indifferent. Even small, local manifestations of grief and injustice are important and serious for us. Otherwise, it turns out like this: we all want our friends and acquaintances to be kind people, but we don’t want to be like that ourselves. We look for sin around us, but it lies on another plane: in us.
The sin of indifference is very serious. It lies at the root of so many sins. For example, it would seem: what does he have to do with gluttony, but it turns out that the glutton first became indifferent to himself, and then began to eat anything at random or without restrictions. It’s the same with the killer: at first he became indifferent to the value of another person’s life, his suffering. On the other hand, if we look at the life of this killer, it will probably turn out that he was surrounded by indifferent people. He is cold to the suffering of others, because he was indifferent to him in childhood and youth.
The problem of indifference to life
The problem of an indifferent attitude towards life can also be caused by individual factors, certain life events, and personal experience. For example, a person who is depressed is most likely indifferent to life and the events taking place in it.
Anyone who has become a victim or suffered from the indifference of other people often becomes indifferent because someone once did not help him.
An indifferent attitude towards life also appears in those who are disappointed in themselves and others, suffer from apathy and do not see the meaning of life.
People who live indifferently are people who have no goals or favorite things to do, who have lost their closest people, and who, for various reasons, are left alone.
People who have selfish tendencies in the bad sense of the word also show indifference in life. they are fixated on themselves, their feelings and worldview. They are sincerely confident that only their problems are the most difficult, while other people’s problems are not worth a damn.
Inveterate egoists never think about helping other people and under no circumstances will they show concern for someone else’s misfortune. Just as they will not sincerely rejoice at someone else’s happiness.
There are times when a person, faced with someone else’s problem, gets lost and doesn’t know what to do or how to behave. Again, the fear of doing something wrong or wrong takes a person aside and prevents him from helping another. These actions and situations cannot be regarded as indifference; rather, they are an exception.
Contempt: what are we dealing with?
Contempt is a negative and derogatory emotion directed at oneself and other people. It is caused by the recognition of oneself, another person, who is not worthy, does not deserve respect and attention. This attitude borders on judgment, superiority, and arrogance. A person who despises himself treats himself with great disdain and disrespect. Contempt performs the function of dominance, superiority over others. It transmits information about status, significance, and strength. However, this model of behavior is more typical for individuals who are unsure of their status. They need this to assert their superiority. The strength and intensity of this emotion can vary, and its companions include anger and aggression. And a grin on the face at the moment of expression of contempt indicates a feeling of pleasure, joy from superiority. But people often disguise their contempt and disdain with a fake smile. Therefore, not everyone can recognize this emotional manifestation immediately.
Read our article “What is a book of shadows and how to use it.”
Depression often hides behind the adrenaline of contempt, causing a temporary increase in energy. In this way, a person manages to be in a non-depressed mood, remaining contemptuous most of the time. However, the rest of the time he almost always lives in depression and anxiety.
Contempt has not been given a place in the basic emotions, but it can be recognized by its characteristic facial expressions, raised eyebrows in surprise, a disgusted one-sided grin, and a mocking tone of voice. Also, such individuals keep their back straight and tilt their head back a little. They want to appear superior to the object of contempt and look down on him. These actions can cause a conflict situation.
The feeling of contempt and disgust can be considered related. However, disgust is felt towards unpleasant things, and contempt presupposes the presence of hierarchy and comparison. Both things and people can be disgusting. They despise only people. In addition, the one who shows contempt for another person feels a sense of superiority over the object of contempt. And this attitude extends to all spheres of life with the presence of comparison. But each of us has our own pros and cons, abilities and capabilities. There is only one life. Therefore, you should not waste your strength and energy on comparisons and negativity.
Indifference: an emotion or a way of life?
Indifference as an emotion can be equated to indifference. Indifference is a consequence of fear. Fear of problems that may arise if a person shows involvement in someone else's fate.
These problems, in fact, have no place in the life of an individual. They do not fit into his regime and do not correspond to his schedule... Indifference has become a common factor in modern society. That’s why there are so many cases when an ambulance is not allowed to go ahead on the highway and in courtyards, when people pass by those lying on the ground, pretending not to notice assaults and beatings on the streets and in neighboring apartments... Indifference and fear of consequences are the two main ones criteria in this sad statistic.
Scientific research into feelings of indifference
Scientific research on indifference has been carried out by both psychologists and philosophers. Fabry, Rubinstein, Spinoza studied indifference. Many agreed that indifference can be equated to apathy, emotional passivity, lack of interests and hobbies, and a decrease in overall activity.
In 1993, N. Fetiskin noted that students and schoolchildren experience boredom during many lectures and lessons.
In 1984, researcher I. Shurygina found bored students among music school students. And in 1989, A. Chebykin revealed the fact that students’ expectations from classes are not met, and instead of positive emotions, they are forced to be bored or afraid of the teacher.
“Emotional-motivational paralysis” - this is the definition of indifference given by the dictionary of Meshcheryakov and Zinchenko.
Indifference is primarily characterized by the absence of any feelings and emotions, both positive and negative. A person does not experience aggression or irritation; he is neither happy nor bored. Indifference often develops after experiencing stress. But many researchers have identified indifference as a symptom of mental or physical illness. Indifference can be provoked by hereditary factors, a nervous breakdown or overstrain, endocrine system problems, certain medications, bad habits and their consequences, and old age.
There are two types of indifference. In the first case, the person looks depressed and sad, he is not interested in the events taking place and the people around him.
In the second case, the individual carefully hides his indifference to life behind the mask of a successful and active person.
How to deal with indifference and indifference?
Is it possible to learn to cope with indifference and indifference? If these feelings have not yet acquired a clinical connotation, it is possible to work with them and achieve positive results too.
What ways can help cope with indifference?
- Concentrating on positive moments and thinking about their meaning in life. positive moments should be consolidated in the subconscious and emerge in particularly difficult periods of life.
- Communication with family and friends, attending cultural events, joining social life. These activities give new emotions and an understanding that there are many interesting people and events around. And it’s a shame to miss this.
- Active and healthy lifestyle, proper nutrition, good sleep. These are well-known concepts that no longer pay attention to. But one way or another, following these rules really works wonders. First through force, then out of habit, a person begins to exercise and eat the right foods. As a result, your mood improves and the desire to live in a new way arises.
- Finding a passion, a hobby. A trip to another city or country with the aim of changing activities and the surrounding reality.
- Training and gaining new knowledge, changing the type of activity. Perhaps indifference is caused by the fact that a person has denied himself his own desires for a long time and did what he does not like.
- Participation in volunteer activities. When a person sees that his work helps save someone or makes life easier for someone, he stops being indifferent to it.
- Pets help cope with indifference and apathy. Caring for them and communicating often brought people back to life.
A long-standing affliction of humanity
Let us remember the Holy Scripture, which speaks of the suffering of the Savior. They tortured him for a day, then led him through the entire city and nailed him to a cross. What were the majority of people doing at this time? They, according to the apostle, stood and watched. The murder of the God-Man occurred at the will of thousands of indifferent people. Those invested with power, like Pilate, simple performers, like soldiers, and all those who stood and did nothing. But among them were those who ate the food that the Lord distributed to them, and those whose relatives He healed. As a result, they remained indifferent. Therefore, behind every brutal crime there is indifference - paralysis of the soul, as Chekhov called it. In our time, the time of the spread of this sin, believers should under no circumstances be indifferent.
Dante in The Divine Comedy depicts the fate of the indifferent as follows:
This is the sad lot of those pitiful souls who lived without knowing neither the glory nor the shame of mortal affairs. And with them a bad flock of angels, Which, without rebelling, was not faithful to the Almighty, observing the middle. Heaven overthrew them, not tolerating the stain; And the abyss of Hell does not accept them, Otherwise guilt would become proud.
These lines are an example of the fact that indifference is a sin inherent in humanity throughout the history of its existence. Lermontov wrote about the same thing in his poem “Duma”:
We are shamefully indifferent to good and evil. At the beginning of the race we wither without a fight; In the face of danger they are shamefully cowardly, And in front of power they are despicable slaves.
Soullessness lies at the basis of all great troubles and misfortunes. We can't be like that. The saints entered the Kingdom of Heaven because they were not indifferent to the evil that they saw around them, to moral vices. This was, for example, John the Baptist: there were many worthy people next to him, but no one told Herod the truth, did not dare to expose him.
