Film "The most charming and attractive." Marry – by mind or by heart?

“Marriage for convenience or for love?” - the dilemma of modern women. If before a woman was not asked who she should marry - she was simply given away, and there was no talk about love, now she has a choice. Some women prefer to think things through carefully before agreeing to marriage. Others say: “As soon as I fall in love, I lose my head. I can't help it. Therefore, marriage is only for love.” In both the first and second cases there are errors.

The authors of the beloved film “The Most Charming and Attractive” are also trying to solve this problem. Let's see how they do it and how useful the advice given in this film can be for women. And the knowledge gained at Yuri Burlan’s training “System-vector psychology” will help us unravel the message hidden in the plot of the film.

“The psychology of marital unions is a little-studied area of ​​psychology and sociology”

There is hardly a person who has not yet seen the film. And yet, let us briefly recall what it is about.

Nadezhda Klyueva works as an engineer at a design institute. The girl has been of marriageable age for a long time, but there are no candidates for her hand and heart. She goes to work every day, actively participates in the social life of the team, and plays ping-pong during lunch breaks. It seems that she is not even thinking about marriage, but time passes.

Having accidentally met her former classmate Susanna, she learns that the main thing a woman needs is to get married successfully. A psychologist and sociologist by profession, Susanna takes the arrangement of her personal life into her own hands, choosing her work colleague Volodya as the object of Nadya’s conquest. In addition to love for her friend, she also has a selfish interest - she is writing a dissertation on the psychology of marriages.

Susanna teaches Nadezhda feminine wisdom - to look good, cook deliciously, and communicate correctly with a man. Nadya blossoms before our eyes. All male colleagues begin to pay attention to her. However, the narcissistic Volodya is in no hurry to succumb to her charms, preferring short-term romances. Moreover, invited by Nadezhda to the concert, he comes with another girl.

Nadya also learns that Susanna’s relationship with her husband, which she created “according to science,” is far from ideal. The husband is cheating on her, but the wife knows nothing about it. Disappointed in the effectiveness of the proposed methods, she returns to her previous lifestyle and again begins to play ping-pong with technician Gena Sysoev.

It seems that this is exactly the person with whom she feels good and comfortable. So was it worth starting all these changes to get to what was nearby? “Perhaps happiness is nearby - just look around,” the filmmakers tell us in the words of the song.

However, not all so simple. In the film, the happy ending remains in question. We never found out whether Gena and Nadya’s relationship worked out in the end or not. Perhaps they remained just friends, continued to play ping-pong, and Nadezhda never married him.

When the film was released, many women seeking marriage adopted the techniques shown in it to attract men. And some people continue to do this to this day because they don’t know any other effective way to create a relationship.

Systematic psychoanalysis shows that Nadezhda Klyueva’s choice is far from clear, especially for modern women. Why? And what method works today? Let's figure it out.

Reviews

We spend the lion's share of our lives at work. For an unmarried woman, work duties often become the only opportunity to spend energy unclaimed for personal relationships. The Design Institute is not the most romantic place in the world. Day after day, year after year, without taking her eyes off the drawing board, a woman completely forgets about her personal life. Often she doesn’t even imagine what her colleague is breathing behind her back, or what kind of close relationship there is. Work turns into hard labor as the lonely person gets closer to admitting his inability to even begin an office romance. Counting on His Majesty's chance is a reckless idea. It’s a completely different matter not to miss the chance to radically change your life, because it may be your last. Sweet, kind, and passionate about the interests of the team, Nadya Klyuyeva is difficult to suspect of adventurism. Alone with herself, she, of course, understands that it is high time for her to get married, but somehow she has come to terms with her fate and is content with the deluge of social work. Having met a childhood friend in the trolleybus, Nadya hardly saw the notorious chance in her. Most likely, she was simply happy for the elegant and attractive Susanna. “At least everything is fine with my friend on the personal front,” the girl thought sadly. The former classmate turned out to be an active person and was not going to just look at the dejected Nadya and her sour face. Down with unnecessary vigilante duty! Down with just mountains of drawings! Down with ping pong as the only joy in life! There is a category of people who need to be forced to love themselves. Susanna decides to make Nadya a woman, not an office mouse. From now on, every man in the design department cannot feel safe - a lonely heart is out hunting. “Perestroika” cinema is usually identified with the era of glasnost, the collapse of prohibitions and the demonstration of previously taboo topics, but this does not apply to all films of that time. “The most charming and attractive” does not have a clear connection to a specific period of Soviet life. At all times, there were enough women who, for some reason, never got married. One could blame the “old maids” themselves for this, one could blame blind men, one could blame treacherous fate, one could do something else. Gerald Bezhanov offers the viewer the opportunity to independently make a verdict on Nadya Klyueva - whether she herself is to blame for her loneliness, or whether the circumstances really turned out that way. The problem of marriage is rising in full force and needs a solution. Bezhanova’s cinema offers two ways to combat loneliness – scientific and natural. Susanna is the personification of a successful woman of the late USSR. Knowing her worth, self-sufficient, scientifically savvy, proficient in newfangled electronics and skillfully finding a common language with black marketeers. In the person of Nadya's friend, the director seems to challenge nature itself. You don’t have to expect anything from anyone, you have to grab it yourself, if necessary, break a person over the knee - for Susanna, the end always justifies the means. A woman cannot be blamed for this. The Soviet people lived too long for the Communist Party and too little for themselves. The apartment of an arrogant black marketeer is a challenge to outdated foundations. Cool clothes, videos, foreign things - all this is so dissonant with the bright image of a worker and a collective farmer that “gray” Nadya seems to find herself in a parallel reality. The scientific approach rejects common interests. Each man in the design bureau is not just an individual worker, but a compositional portrait with strengths and weaknesses. The deliberate seriousness of Susanna’s technique, with all the accompanying comedy, reveals very important nuances of personality. One of Nadya’s colleagues is too correct and primitive, the other is an incorrigible womanizer with a wedding ring, the third is already aged, the fourth is only good for ping-pong, the fifth is a narcissistic dude and ladies’ man. Apparently, Susanna does not consider any of them as individuals. This is partly due to resentment for a friend, partly due to flashy self-confidence. Science should complement and enrich the human mind, but not replace it. That is why there is bewilderment in Nadya’s eyes. Diligently following the precepts of her sociologist friend, she still cannot fully believe in them. What is the situation like through the eyes of Nadya Klyueva herself? A trip to the black marketeer: “This is all not for me, Susannochka.” Characteristics of colleagues: “I don’t care about him at all,” “he has two daughters,” “well, he’s a good person,” “he doesn’t consider me a person at all.” Culinary preparations: “but how can I slip him these pies?” The image of Nadya absorbed many of the features of good, pleasant ladies, but not very interesting to anyone. Gerald Bezhanov painted a portrait of an inconspicuous man who disappeared into the eternal construction of communism. Nadia is a product of a vicious system that prescribes living only for future generations. A downtrodden, lonely woman does not raise her eyes once again, otherwise she would certainly have noticed that each of her colleagues is happy in their own way. Some people get married endlessly, some make jokes about their wife and mother-in-law, and for some, fleeting connections are enough, but they are all happy with their lives because they have learned to love and value themselves. A meeting with Susanna is a harbinger of a battle between developed intellect and a warm heart. This is the very case when there is a unique opportunity to look at yourself through the eyes of another person, whose opinion can be considered authoritative. Nadya will change her wardrobe, change her hairstyle, learn fashionable words, but all this is empty if you don’t learn to listen to your heart. Its rhythms will always be more important than the data of advanced computers. “The Most Charming and Attractive” is definitely one of the three best films by Irina Muravyova. Known for her severity with herself, the outstanding actress recognizes Nadya Klyueva as the most important page in her biography. However, the success of the film is not only due to Muravyova. Gerald Bezhanov managed to unite stars of the first magnitude with his idea. Still young, Mikhail Kokshenov, Leonid Kuravlev, Alexander Abdulov and Tatyana Vasilyeva, who acted at an incredible level, immortalized a movie in which romance coexists with sorrows, and soft irony with cruel sarcasm. The whole country understood what auto-training is and remembered the expression “Are you from the Urals?” and fell in love with the simple designer Nadya Klyueva. The problem of personal insecurity will haunt Russian women for a long time, and therefore “The Most Charming and Attractive” will not lose its well-deserved audience attention. 10 of 10

“According to calculations, it’s very possible, as long as the calculations are correct!”

So why didn't the scientific calculation work? After all, Susanna most likely set the right guidelines, since at the end of the picture all the men “noticed” Nadya as a woman. The refrain in the film is the words of the auto-training that Susanna conducted with her friend: “I am the most charming and attractive. All men are crazy about me...” Words that became a mantra of hope for a whole generation of women, later called affirmations.

At the “System-Vector Psychology” training we will learn why affirmations don’t work. It is impossible to reprogram consciousness if the unconscious programs that are the main driver of our lives are not realized. Consciousness is only a small superstructure that serves our desires, but the basis of the iceberg of our psyche is in a hidden state, and it can only be influenced by bringing it out through awareness.

It’s just that, along with affirmations, Susanna used centuries-old experience in building relationships, although without fully realizing it. As Yuri Burlan says at the training, a woman, of course, should be attractive and desirable to a man. It sets the tone in a relationship and gives impetus to create an emotional connection. So Susanna’s advice to change her image, dress fashionably, share Volodya’s interests, support him, and praise him was justified.

But the most important thing is that Nadezhda’s inner state has changed, and this attracts men much more than external beauty. She felt inspired by the flaring hope of meeting her love and believed that this was possible for her. She opened up emotionally, became more feminine, allowing the man to be a little ahead of her and ceasing to demonstrate her desire to command him. On Susanna’s advice, Nadya stopped doing social work so zealously, handing out responsibilities and criticisms to everyone.

Of course, next to her, the men immediately felt the desire to fulfill their male role of protector and began to give gifts. Misha Dyatlov - flowers in memory of the joint business trip. Lekha Pryakhin treated him to village apples. Volodya brought a scarce Czech eraser and promised to invite her to the concert. And now they already felt that they were missing something when she went off to play ping-pong with Gena again.

And yet, the conquest of men by science did not lead to the desired result. There is a popular wisdom: “You can’t be nice by force.” And there is a completely reasonable explanation for this wisdom.

“There needs to be an eternal battle, so that everything burns with a blue flame!”

At the “System-Vector Psychology” training we learn that relationships between a man and a woman begin with attraction. And on the basis of attraction, an emotional connection can already be built that will preserve the relationship for many years. After all, attraction based on animal attraction by smell, by pheromones, lasts on average up to three years, and then what keeps us together is our ability to create human connections - sensual, spiritual, intellectual.

Nadezhda Klyueva was not attracted to any of the men. There was no spark from which the flame of long-term mutual love could flare up. Nadya herself didn’t know who she liked. “Purely outwardly” she liked Volodya. But when Klavdia Matveevna noticed that she was “running after Volodka,” the girl replied: “It’s time for me to get married, and he is a suitable candidate.” “Candidacy” is a strange word to describe a person with whom you are in love and who should evoke a storm of emotions. Nadya, as the owner of a visual vector, was looking for a strong feeling, but did not find it in herself.

And she didn't really have a choice. Volodya is a representative of the skin vector, not very developed and not very realized. Klavdia Matveevna described him with one apt word - dude. Of course, working as an engineer presupposes a good level of implementation of the skin vector, but there is a difference between an engineer and an engineer. When he actually works as a draftsman, a routine arises and the active, mobile leather worker who strives for constant changes lacks fulfillment. Therefore, as Yuri Burlan says, such a leather worker will “get” realization through numerous love affairs, which is what Volodya did.

By the way, Misha Dyatlov, who is married and has two daughters, acts in the same way, solving the problem of insufficient implementation of the skin vector by constantly cheating on his wife. Seeing the changes in Nadya, he is no longer averse to having an affair with her, but “at work - no way!”... The owner of the anal vector Lech Pryakhin is not interesting to Nadya - he is too simple. Interests: eating, football, bathhouse. And a visual girl needs strong feelings.

Against this background, Gena Sysoev begins to seem like the closest person to her. She misses playing ping pong together. Truly a good person, positive in all respects. But what connects them besides ping-pong during lunch break? All we know about him is that he is a technician, which means we can assume that he is a sought-after professional with an anal vector. That is, he can potentially be quite developed, have the value of a family, and be a faithful, devoted and reliable husband. Certainly not the worst batch. Moreover, he likes Nadya.

Such marriages, based on friendship and respect, were quite common in the USSR. "Do you love your wife?" - they asked the husband. “I respect her very much. She is a wonderful housewife, the mother of my children.” The wife said the same thing about her husband: “He is a very good person, a caring husband and father.” But is this only what Nadezhda needs?

Simple-minded Gena answers Susanna’s question about whether he would invite a woman for a cup of coffee with all the ensuing consequences: “I don’t understand what consequences follow from a cup of coffee.” Where is the passion, where is the attraction, where is the love, after all? After all, for a visual person, which Nadya is, love is the meaning of life. If things work out between them and Gena, it will be a couple based on friendship and respect, but a boring and insipid marriage.

However, she is afraid to admit to herself that she wants love. “Is it bad to love?” - she asks timidly. Wants and doubts...

“Men as a class do not exist for me”

Most likely, internal settings interfered with her. She seemed to be in denial about the relationship and didn’t pay attention to men. She herself told Susanna at the very beginning of the film: “I treat them like empty space. I need them like a dog needs them...” And in this regard, apparently, lies the problem. She simply did not allow men to show any initiative, she nipped all advances in the bud, showing with all her appearance that she did not need a man. Even when the not too decisive Gena tried to show her that he liked her, saying: “You have become even more beautiful,” she did not notice that this was a compliment from a man. I decided it was a joke...

Developed anal-cutaneous-visual Nadezhda Klyueva is combative, active, responsible, conscientious, and caring. Without hesitation, she rushes to detain criminals on duty in the people's squad. A sort of image of an “activist and Komsomol member,” for whom the main thing is work, the team, and social work. But the family does not work out because there is no understanding of oneself, one’s desires.

Context

Soviet films of the 1980s, in which heroines solved similar problems:

— “In love by choice” (1982) — the main character is engaged in auto-training and wants to change not only her appearance, but also her destiny;

— “The Singles Are Provided with a Dorm” (1983) — the main character becomes a matchmaker for the lonely girls of her dormitory;

— “A Lonely Woman Wants to Meet” (1986) — the main character decides her fate herself and posts notices around the area that she would not mind meeting a man.

Love in the Soviet way - past and present

Man is inseparable from the time in which he lives. The film “The Most Charming and Attractive” was released in 1985. Only two years remained before the start of perestroika and several years until the difficult 90s for our country, when the era of the USSR faded into oblivion. The completion of this era marked the final transition of humanity from the anal phase of development to the cutaneous one. For our country, this meant a gradual decrease in the value of family, friendship and a transition to the values ​​of the skin vector. The time of consumer society was coming with its desire for material success, the destruction of the institution of marriage, which seemed unshakable for centuries, and gigantic changes - not only in everyday life, but also in the human psyche.

The film tells us about old values ​​that were gradually becoming a thing of the past. The authors tried to show that foppishness and consumerism are bad. The phrase “Are you from the Urals?”, said by the black marketeer who “dressed” Nadya, still hurts the ear. You can’t build a family with the dude Volodka, either because Gena is calm and devoted. Therefore, such an ending, reflecting the family values ​​of a Soviet person, is completely justified.

However, people's desires are growing, the volume of the psyche is increasing. Previously, women with a visual vector often chose simple men, hard workers with a muscle vector, and were happily married. They didn't find them boring. On the contrary, they were real men for them. And visual women followed their husbands to collective farms, villages, and settlements and brought culture there.

It's a completely different time now. As Yuri Burlan says at the training, today women are exchanging “a bunch of handy grain growers for one bespectacled programmer.” This means that a man’s physical strength and “handedness” are secondary; his feelings and intelligence, his attitude towards a woman are much more important. The feeling of safety and security that a man gives a woman is provided today to a greater extent by an emotional connection, and intellectual work presupposes a higher level of realization and demand in society. Especially if we are talking about a woman with a visual vector. Nadezhda already wanted love, bright feelings, but she was still afraid of herself, hiding behind rationalizations that she needed men like a dog’s fifth leg.

Strong feelings and spiritual closeness in relationships today are especially necessary for visual people, because human emotional development is reaching its peak. And even people who do not have a visual vector are capable and should create emotional connections - this is what makes a family strong. And only a sensual, spiritual connection can give our contemporaries the experience of true happiness.

Simply put, today, in order to create a happy relationship, it is no longer enough for the person to be good. It is important that he is right for you, so that you can have a heart-to-heart talk with him. Today, people have become more demanding in relationships, unlike those times when it was enough to like each other and look for common ground in the process of life.

LiveInternetLiveInternet

The premiere of the film “I am the most charming and attractive” took place in December 1985. As soon as it hit the screens, the film was a stunning success. It was watched by 80 million viewers, 69 countries purchased the film for screening. And although a quarter of a century has already passed, and in the country there are no longer any blackmailers, giant research institutes and large-sized computers, which are discussed in the comedy, a touching story about how a simple employee Nadya Klyueva, with the help of her sociologist friend Susanna, is trying to find a groom, - the audience still likes it.

Director Gerald Bezhanov:

“I wanted to make a film with a good human story, nice characters and a happy ending. And also, so that movie situations are understandable and recognizable in real life. This recipe was invented in Hollywood, but then forgotten. And I always use it. My comedies talk about how to find happiness in life. To do this, you need to take only one step, but you must do it.

— WHEN I start filming, the most important thing for me is to sharply select the cast. This is already 50 percent of the film's success. If Irina Muravyova were not with us, there would be no painting. I followed her for six months, stood on my knees, begged her husband, “licked” her traces near the Theater. Mossovet. And yet he obtained Muravyova’s consent to film the comedy.

She is a unique actress! Both creatively and humanly. Muravyova was young, plump, lively, organic. She lived for the picture, listened to all the advice in order to more accurately play the image of Nadya. I dreamed of working with this actress again someday, but it didn’t work out. And I am very sorry that she did not act in films for a long time.

Irina Muravyova herself refused to star in this film until the last moment: the script seemed too naive to her. After watching the footage, the actress was very upset - she didn’t like herself so much. But as the years passed, she changed her mind radically: “It turned out to be a wonderful picture!”

G. Bezhanov:

— When I write a script, I think through everything to the smallest detail. And I demand from the actors that they perform everything exactly according to the script, right down to the comma. This irritates many people, people and honored ones try to improvise: “Let's throw it away! Let me do this!”

I say: “You stew in a tiny composition, and I create the score.” Kuravlev and I are friends, he creaked, but still did as written. Abdulov was terribly annoyed, and so was Vasilyeva.

She once came to the set, but didn’t know the text, hadn’t learned it. But this is your job! If you are a professional, how can you come to the set without knowing the text! And one day she just drove me crazy.

Imagine: we are filming a scene when Nadya and Susanna come to Nadya’s work to “investigate” the work team, to look at the heroes Abdulov, Kokshenov and Kuravlev. Susanna was blonde. The next day Vasilyeva comes to work on the same scene, I look, and she’s... red. I dyed my hair bright red! I’m shocked: “Tanya, are you crazy? We haven’t finished the scene!” “What is it? I didn’t do anything,” she says calmly.

“So am I crazy?” — I’m looking for support from the film crew. And the people gathered there were cheerful, the cameraman also decided to make fun of me: “But she didn’t dye her hair, yesterday she was filming the same.” I grabbed the camera (and cameras were huge back then), swung it, and suddenly my heart skipped a beat...

They managed to catch the camera, and they took me away in an ambulance. Microinfarction. It sat there for almost a month, and if I hadn’t been the author of the script, the film would definitely have been transferred to another director. By the way, Vasilyeva never changed her color back. Therefore, Susanna had to wear a white cap.

By the way, when choosing actresses, Bezhanov tried Inna Churikova and Lyubov Polishchuk for the role of Susanna, but settled on Vasilyeva. However, he did not regret this, despite her absurd character.

The ENTIRE film was shot without leaving Moscow. By the way, it cost only 500 thousand rubles. The comedy, as always, was given on a residual basis. The heroes' apartments and the design department were filmed in the Mosfilm pavilions. And the checkpoint was real - we made a fence at some Moscow factory. The building and corridors in which the characters work were also filmed in a real research institute.

They brought there a machine with sparkling water. Remember how Kuravlev forced Kokshenov to drink soda so that Shirvindt wouldn’t get it: “Water is only for institute employees”? Poor Misha Kokshenov almost burst. And all because Shirvindt and Kuravlev constantly mocked and teased him. Misha couldn't stand it and started laughing. As a result, the scene was filmed only on the eighth take, and the unfortunate Kokshenov had to drink eight glasses of sparkling water.

Muravyova and Nosik had to learn to play table tennis. Nose, training hard, managed to break his toe. In the scene where his character walks with Nadya under an umbrella, he tried to behave so that the audience would not notice that the actor was limping.

TO transform Nadya from ugly to beautiful, we needed fashionable things. But in 1985, Mosfilm would have made monstrous costumes. How did you get out? They used the actors' wardrobe, if, of course, they agreed. Irina Muravyova at the end of the film appeared in her own dresses and a white fur coat, and the red hat on her heroine belonged to Tatyana Vasilyeva. Do you remember how Muravyova’s heroine comes to work in a cap with a pompom, and Kuravlyov says that Nadya in it looks like the clown Oleg Popov? This was Larisa Udovichenko's personal cap.

Vera Sotnikova, who played the girlfriend of Abdulov’s hero, also starred in her clothes. Almost the only thing that was custom-made specifically for the film was the costume of Mikhail Kokshenov, in which he tried to charm Nadya.

The director tried to play up in the film the fact that it was difficult to buy decent clothes in the country. But he didn’t get into trouble at all for bringing up the topic of black marketeers...

Remember in the film there is a scene where Susanna brings Nadya to the black marketeer, Muravyova’s heroine looks at fashionable clothes without enthusiasm and he eventually loses patience: “Is she from the Urals?” Hearing this phrase, Boris Yeltsin, then still the first secretary of the Sverdlovsk Regional Committee of the CPSU, became very angry. In his opinion, the filmmakers greatly offended the residents of the region. The director had to write letters to Boris Nikolaevich with an apology. And in his next comedy “Where is Nophelet?” one of the heroines pronounces a whole monologue about good people from the “land of malachite.”

QUOTES from the film:

Randomness is a special case of regularity. Water is only for institute workers!.. Drink, Lekha! Tell me, how do you view the intermediate shaft? Like a beam with a pinched end?

The first commandment: do not be born beautiful, but be born active!

We cannot expect favors from nature. Taking them from her is our task. Remember this. - Michurin's words. - No, mine. Because Michurin said this about apple and pear trees, and I’m talking about men.

You are all baking something, girls, you are baking... It would be better if you fermented cabbage, or something...

This is the first time I’ve seen trainers who don’t have pineapples!

Oh, what boys are in this carriage... - Come on, come on, girls... Get out of harm's way!

“Even the most backward sections of the population are already wearing jeans.

Don't you see? By cotton and by label!

Cardin! We have two or three of these in our Union. And then - with the wives of diplomats from non-aligned countries.

Source

https://1001material.ru/18641.html

https://www.spletnik.ru/blogs/pro_kino/48023_citaty_iz_filma_samaya_obayatelnaya_i_privlekatelnaya

Series of messages “A movie is being made...”:
Part 1 - The most charming and attractive.

“There are no recipes in love - let’s trust fate”?

So what should you listen to - your heart or your mind when choosing a life partner for many years? Systematically, we now understand that attraction is not under our control, it is in the hands of nature. But the choice we make consciously still remains ours. Fortunately, there is now a recipe for a happy relationship.

At the time of the story shown to us in the film “The Most Charming and Attractive,” a couple could only be found in the immediate environment. In the USSR, office romances very often broke out at work - it was in the order of things. But the choice was limited. This created a certain doom: if you didn’t meet a couple among your former classmates, at the institute, in the yard, at work, you could give up on family life, on future happiness.

Now the situation has changed. People now have many more choices. For example, the Internet with its unlimited possibilities. You can find a suitable person even on the other side of the world. And the training “System-vector psychology”

will help you avoid fatal mistakes when choosing a partner. This is roughly how a girl with system knowledge does it:

Author of the publication: Marina Golomolzina, journalist
The article was written based on materials from the training “System-vector psychology”