Humorous statements about the difficult work within the walls of a pharmacy
Let's start with cool statuses about pharmacists.
- A pharmacist is a real magician. He doesn't even have to sell medicine; for example, instead of buying a laxative, he may suggest that the buyer simply look at the prices at the pharmacy.
- It's difficult to work as a pharmacist. Especially when men come and ask for “food for the children.”
- There is no job harder than a pharmacist. After all, you also need to be a translator at the same time. How could it be otherwise, if they ask for either a tincture of nonsense or “Faust-gel”?
- The buyer asked - if the candle is placed at night, then when you wake up in the morning, do you need to take it out? Since then, I have been puzzled why pharmacists are not paid for additional visits to a psychotherapist.
- The other day, an old lady asked whether comfrey ointment was named after some herbaceous plant, or after a person who sat in the trenches during wartime? I feel like an encyclopedia...
- Recently a client called and, instead of asking about the availability of medicine, asked the question: “Please tell me how to cook borscht?” - “Dear, but you’re calling the pharmacy.” - “I know, but is it difficult for you to tell? You only have girls working for you.”
- If people took vodka strictly according to a doctor’s prescription, at a certain time and according to the prescribed dosage, it would hardly be enjoyable.
- A pharmacist can always act as a psychologist. For example, if a buyer simultaneously buys Novopassit tablets, valerian, and sleeping pills, it is impossible not to know how the person is doing...
- The pharmacist is a sales genius. He can always get out of any awkward situation. For example, if a buyer asks for a hematogen made from the blood of a hedgehog, he will find one with a funny hedgehog on the packaging...
- If the pharmacy suddenly runs out of a contraceptive patch, the pharmacist will still find a way out of this situation - he will offer a regular one. After all, they can also seal anything!
- Only a true pharmacist working by vocation knows: it is much better to sweat from the heat in the summer than from the flu in the winter.
- If a buyer asks what the pharmacy has for gray hair, a competent pharmacist will always answer - respect...
- Pharmacists, after all, are dangerous people... After all, they work in a place where they sell both means for prolonging life and goods that help prevent it...
- An experienced pharmacist always knows what is causing the increase in consumer demand for a particular medicine. For example, old women buy validol not because of magnetic storms - this happens once a month when bills for the apartment arrive.
- Only a pharmacist knows how loyal a friendship can be. After all, if a buyer asks for a medicine for hemorrhoids for a friend, knowing where hemorrhoids are located and how long ago he began to bother him...
- A smart pharmacist posted an ad: “If you don’t buy condoms or birth control pills now, in 9 months you’ll be running here for nipples!”
- The greatest responsibility in the life of a pharmacist: when a seasoned man, covered in tattoos, shows up as a buyer and says: “Brother, sell me a sedative. There’s a guy in my neighborhood who’s getting on my nerves... I’m afraid I’ll take him down, but I don’t want to sit there anymore...”
Quotes on the topic "Pharmacy"
. Caught a cold. Cough. I went to the pharmacy, which I don’t do very often. I chose what I usually use for several decades. Standing in line, I hear typical questions and answers: “What do you advise me for cough, aching joints and headaches?” - Give something for fever, cough, joint pain and headache. ***
- Coldrex, lollipops..., lozenges... antibiotics, total 600-1500 rubles. I didn’t consider it necessary to argue with the pharmacist, that’s their job, but I decided to put on a small show. So, my turn has come: “What do you advise me for a cough?” - Lollipops "..." - How much do they cost? - 300 rubles
- HOW MANY? TALK LOUDER, PLEASE, I CAN'T HEAR IT ALL!!! - 300 RUBLES! — DO YOU HAVE MUKALTIN? - yes - HOW MUCH DOES IT COST? - 5 rubles - LOUDER, I CAN'T HEAR IT BADLY! - 5 RUBLES !!! — the echo spread the news throughout the pharmacy, the queue became wary, all attention from the windows shifted to the pharmacist and me. — IS THERE THERMOPSIS HERB WITH SODA 7, THEY WERE USED TO BE CALLED PENNY TABLETS? - EAT! - HOW MANY? — 1 RUBLE!!! - PLEASE SPECIFY! — 1 RUBLE!!! - the temperature of the conversation increased, the pharmacist became increasingly incensed, and the audience began to grumble... - PERTUSSIN MIXTURE? - EAT! - HOW MANY? - 4−50! - PROPOLIS OINTMENT? -12 RUBLES, BUT SHE IS HOMEOPATHIC - EXCELLENT!!! — MILK THISTLE MEAL? — 8 RUBLES — MILK THISTLE OIL? — 12 RUBLES In the end, I ordered: thermopsis 3×10 tablets — 3 rubles, mucaltin 2 packs. x10 tablets - 10 rubles, propolis ointment 1 tube - 12 rubles, pertussin 1 bottle - 4−50, milk thistle meal 1 package - 8 rubles (now prices have become a little higher) - HOW MUCH FOR EVERYTHING? - 37 and a half rubles. — 37.50 — IS THIS TEMPERATURE OR PRICE? SPEAK LOUDER PLEASE! - THIRTY. SEVEN. RUBLE Y. F Y T D E S I T. K O P E E K! - the pharmacist hammered the nails... her face was burgundy-stony. - Thank you! - I answered quietly. The woman with the child was the first to break down: “Is this all for a cough?” Can you write down the names? Why so cheap? - These medicines were always cheap, and we were treated with them in childhood, and our parents were treated with them! - WHY THEN ARE THEY NOT ON THE SHOW SHOW? - THIS IS NOT BENEFITABLE FOR THE PHARMACIST, HE DOES NOT BE PAID FOR THEM BY PHARMACEUTICAL CAMPAIGNS.
For reference: Many expensive drugs have a cheaper analogue with an identical composition. Write down their names if you don’t want to “work for a pharmacy”!
Let's compare:
Nurofen (120 rubles) and Ibuprofen (10 rubles) Mezim (300 rubles) and Pancreatin (30 rubles) No-spa (150 rubles) and Drotaverine hydrochloride (30 rubles) Panadol (50 rubles) and Paracetamol (5 rubles) Belosalik (380 rubles) and Akriderm S K (40 rubles) Bepanten (250 rubles) and Dexpanthenol (100 rubles) Betaserc (600 rubles) and Betagistin (250 rubles) Bystrumgel (180 rubles) and Ketoprofen (60 rubles) Voltaren (300 rubles) and Diclofenac (40 rubles) Gastrozol (120 rubles) and Omeprazole (50 rubles) Detralex (580 rubles) and Venarus (300 rubles) Diflucan (400 rubles) and Fluconazole (30 rubles) Dlynos (100 rubles) and Rinostop (30 rubles) Zantac (280 rubles) and Ranitidine (30 rubles) Zirtec (220 rubles) and Cetirinax (80 rubles) Zovirax (240 rubles) and Acyclovir (40 rubles) Immunal (200 rubles) and Echinacea extract (50 rubles) Imodium (300 rubles) and Loperamide (20 rubles) Iodomarin (220 rubles) and Potassium iodide (100 rubles) Cavinton (580 rubles) and Vinpocetine (200 rubles) Claritin (180 rubles) and Loragexal (60 rubles) Klacid (600 rubles) ) and Clarithromycin (180 rubles) Lazolvan (320 rubles) and Ambroxol (20 rubles) Lamisil (400 rubles) and Terbinafine (100 rubles) Lyoton-1000 (350 rubles) and Heparin-acrigel 1000 (120 rubles) Lomilan (150 rubles) and Loragexal (50 rubles) Maxidex (120 rubles) ) and Dexamethasone (40 rubles) Midriacil (360 rubles) and Tropicamide (120 rubles) Miramistin (200 rubles) and Chlorhexidine (10 rubles) Movalis (410 rubles) and Meloxicam (80 rubles) Neuromultivit (250 rubles) and Pentovit (50 rubles) Normodipine (620 rubles) and Amlodipine (40 rubles ) Omez (180 rubles) and Omeprazole (50 rubles) Panangin (140 rubles) and Asparkam (10 rubles) Pantogam (350 rubles) and Pantocalcin (230 rubles) Rhinonorm (50 rubles) and Rinostop (20 rubles) Sumamed (450 rubles) and Azithromycin (90 rubles) Trental (200 rubles) and Pentoxifylline (50 rubles) Trichopolum (90 rubles) and Metronidazole (10 rubles) Troxevasin (220 rubles) and Troxerutin (110 rubles) Ultop (270 rubles) and Omeprazole (50 rubles) Fastum-gel (250 rubles) and Ketoprofen (70 rubles) Finlepsin (280 rubles) and Carbamazepine ( 50 rubles) Flucostat (200 rubles) and Fluconazole (20 rubles) Furamag (380 rubles) and Furagin (40 rubles) Hemomycin (300 rubles) and Azithromycin (100 rubles) Enap (150 rubles) and Enalapril (70 rubles) Ersefuril (400 rubles) and Furazolidone (40 rubles)
Ironic statuses
Since this work is directly related to human health - in fact, life and death - some statuses for pharmacists are filled with irony.
- Every pharmacist knows that you should never skimp on your health.
- The pharmacist is a real accomplice of evil. After all, the industry in which he works has the terrifying ability to transform milligrams of a substance into billions of dollars.
- Many pharmacy shoppers would do well to remember that health is not on the drug shelves. Health is something that should be on everyone's mind.
- A smart and insightful pharmacist knows that instructions for medications are always written in small print for a reason. Indeed, in this case, the patient will never know what kind of medicine drove him crazy.
- A pharmacist can sell anything. Even a plane ticket to the constellation Orion. True, he will have a bright future for this... by no means a stellar future.
Medicine. Healthy sayings about medicine
Some medicines are worse than the disease itself.
Diseases cannot be treated with medicine, my dears... You must live correctly...
For a young man there is not and cannot be a more healing psychotherapy than a charming young woman.
Humor saves you from a heart attack... Especially useful at night with kefir!
If cat purr were sold in tablet form, the pharmaceutical market would have an ideal anti-depression drug.
The most reliable cure for illusions is looking in the mirror.
Time does not heal, it only makes you think and look at things differently!
Healthy sayings about medicine
Our health is harmed by frequent changes of medications and undigested food.
Doctors have an arsenal of weapons at the ready: antibiotics - to kill the infection, drugs - to defeat the pain, scalpels and dilators - to remove tumors and cancer, to destroy the threat, but only the physical threat... You are alone with all other troubles.
Various hefty statements about medicine
Work is the best cure for heavy thoughts.
Work has always been a panacea for her, a cure for all illnesses. When she was happy, she worked. When I was sad, I also worked. I was sick and worked. Work healed everything. Even a broken heart, when it seemed like you could die. She knew this from bitter experience.
Time heals and erases all the mistakes of life...
Communication with friends, both real and virtual, is the best cure for the blues and depression!
I believe that medications should not be taken at all when nothing serious is happening, such as a slight ailment or unpleasant sensations.
Boiled coffee, known to the Persians and Turks and common after lunch, is a fair cure for arrogance, runny noses and headaches.
I can repeat the cure for jealousy to anyone at least a thousand times... That those who take care of themselves do not need to take care of their husband!
Name the disease, a cure will be found.
Every medicine must have its first patient.
If a lot of remedies are offered against a disease, then the disease is incurable.
Sometimes the only cure for a sick soul is just one phone call.
If they invent a cure, they will invent a disease.
Lovely healthy sayings about medicine
Often love turns into a headache, and flirting is a pill for it. I ate it, and it seemed to go away for a while.
The cure for stupidity already exists... Read books!
Discs with Stas Mikhailov's album were delivered to pharmacies in the city. Sold as an emetic, patients are delighted.
Brown laundry soap helps with poison ivy burns, iodine helps with cuts and abrasions, damp earth helps with bee stings, honey with sore throats, and chalk for fractures. What helps against meanness? Where can I get a cure for trouble, for dishonesty?
Very often the best medicine is to do without it.
Sell time in pharmacies then... It heals...
Why does baby aspirin come in jars that children cannot open?
The doctor prescribed tablets on an empty stomach. The question is, where can I get a STOCHKAK three times a day?
Time is a tireless medicine. When it passes, consciousness will come. And after enlightenment you will explode again, but for now your volcano decided to sleep in order to understand why it needs to wake up.
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Cinema has never saved anyone's life, it is not a medicine that can save someone's life. It's just aspirin.
The better the doctor, the more useless drugs he knows.
The cure for laziness is well known. These are kicks and slaps on the head.
What cannot be cured with medicine can be cured with a knife; what cannot be cured with a knife can be cured with a hot iron; that which cannot be cured by a hot iron should be considered incurable.
Affirmative healthy sayings about medicine
The side effect of many new and expensive drugs is ruination.
Sex, sleep and fresh air are a miracle cocktail for stress and depression!
Movement in its effect can replace any remedy, but all the healing remedies in the world cannot replace the effect of movement.
- What does this doctor do for you? - asked the king. - Sire! - Moliere answered him. — We chat with him about different things. From time to time he prescribes me medications, and just as carefully as he prescribes them to me, I don’t take them and always get better, Your Majesty!
And no pills will help here. The only thing that helps in such cases is time. A broken soul must heal like broken bones heal...
Smart advice is a medicine that does not help fools.
Laughter heals. But not the one who laughs; but the one who is being laughed at.
The best cure for love is new love!
Hard physical labor is the best cure for everyday schizophrenia.
I bought Strepfen for a sore throat. There are 16 tablets in a pack. On the back side in the red frame “Method of administration and dosage” are the last two phrases: - Do not take more than 5 tablets within 24 hours. - You should not take pills for more than 3 days. The question is - what is the 16th tablet for???
A double blow to the disease is to wash down the tablet with holy water.
Welcoming healthy sayings about medicine
Is it necessary to treat your husband like a medicine if he drips on your brain 3 times a day?!
The best healer in this world is time, only it will heal the wounds in the heart...
I believe that a good psychiatrist should avoid drugs - they... Well, how can I explain this to you... Like cosmetics. They don’t solve problems, they only hide them from prying eyes.
From an overdose of nauseating... only an anti-vomiting agent saves...
Reading was for me the best remedy against troubles in life; there was no grief that an hour of reading did not dispel.
The only cure for one man is another man. Preferably even younger and prettier.
Is there a panacea for you... Death is better than cure...
No need, don’t treat... After all, this is not a disease. What we feel, on the contrary, is medicine. And it gives light in gray everyday life. And that means everything is not in vain, everything is not in vain. And a sweet spasm in the throat, a pinching in the chest screams that you and I are alive... And we want these sensations again!
The Internet saves you from insomnia.
I wonder why in the hospital they treat with cheap Russian-made drugs, but in the clinic they prescribe expensive imported analogues to take home?
If there is a cure, then you have nothing to worry about. All you have to do is accept it. If there is no cure, then why worry? Worry only makes the suffering worse.
Doctors give drops if they don’t know what to prescribe.
- The best cure for all diseases is money! - Doctor, write out a prescription.
Corona does not cure headaches.
The homeopathic principle that it is the woman who cures us is perhaps most borne out by experience.
Inform your friends about the publication “Medicine. Healthy sayings about medicine” and read Armenian proverbs and sayings: How many languages you know, so many lives you live.
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Phrases with deep implications
Statuses about pharmacists meaningfully reveal the details of this work more deeply.
- Pharmacist is a noble profession. After all, it is he who is the guide to the world of civilization and culture: what distinguishes a person from an animal is the desire to periodically take medicine.
- Frequently changing medications is harmful to health, as is frequent changes of pharmacist at the nearest pharmacy.
- Pharmacists always want to help people. It’s a pity that there is no cure for death alone...
- The pharmacist is a real genius. After all, he is able to decipher what the doctor wrote in the prescription.
- Every talented and educated pharmacist knows the main principle of treatment: the dosage should be minimal, although not less than necessary.
- Pharmacist is a profession that teaches humility. After all, there is nothing more stupid than refraining from reading the instructions for the medicine - just like not studying a map of an unfamiliar area because of false pride.
- No matter how much customers are outraged by the high cost of birth control pills, the pharmacist knows: it’s better to buy them - it’s still cheaper than having a child.
- No matter how talented the pharmacist is, the buyer is still responsible for the drugs he decides to take.
Many pharmacy clients actually have health problems. The problem is that more than half of these problems are directly related to too much free time.
